Neither of us can stand our families!

Updated: 24 October, 2020 06:07 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

We are invited to each other's homes often, and try to behave as pleasantly as possible, but it puts a huge strain on us both and I am afraid of how it will affect our relationship

Illustration/ Uday Mohite
Illustration/ Uday Mohite

picMy girlfriend and I love each other a lot but can't stand the idea of spending time with our respective families because they are very different from who we are. We are invited to each other's homes often, and try to behave as pleasantly as possible, but it puts a huge strain on us both and I am afraid of how it will affect our relationship. How can we be together if we can't deal with each other's families?

Two people in a relationship are the only ones who have to deal with that relationship. What matters is how the two of you treat each other, what you want out of this, and what you are both prepared to do to make it work. If spending time with your families is difficult, try and work out a compromise that limits those interactions. Your families are presumably important to you both, but don't necessarily have to be as important to your partners. Talk about what makes you uncomfortable, and what you can both do to help the other deal with this better.

I'm not sure where things stand between my ex-girlfriend and myself because we keep contacting each other after we break up and soon get back together. This has happened three times now, and it is starting to be amusing for our friends. I think it's a serious problem though, because we are either breaking up for the wrong reasons or getting back for the wrong reasons. How do we fix this?

You can start by listing why the two of you have broken up three times, and what has made you get back every time. If you can't imagine being without each other, it's a sign that everything you both think of as a problem has a solution if you care enough to find it. The next time one of you wants to break up, why not try being patient instead?

The inbox is now open to take your most carnal and amorous queries. Send your questions on email to lovedoc@mid-day.com

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First Published: 24 October, 2020 06:05 IST

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