'She is yet to tell me if she feels the same'

Updated: 03 August, 2020 07:13 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

She says she doesn't know whether she wants anything serious. We still hang out often and talk

Illustration/Uday Mohite
Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dr LoveI confessed my feelings to a good friend some time ago and it has been more than five months, but she has not given me a definite answer. She says she doesn't know whether she wants anything serious. We still hang out often and talk. Should I push her for an answer or just go with the flow? I am confused. I also know it will be hard to stay friends with her if she turns me down.
— Sid
This is pretty much a situation you are choosing to put yourself in. If someone doesn't want to be romantically involved with you, and you are willing to give up a friendship on the basis of that refusal, how exactly is it her fault? If she needs time to figure this out, you should give it to her, given that you are the one who initiated this conversation. If she hasn't responded in months, it's possible that she isn't interested but doesn't want to lose you as a friend. Why not simply ask if that is the case so you can put this behind you? Also, do consider the possibility that you can be friends with someone without being in a romantic relationship with them.

My wife and I don't fight very often but, when we do, it is often about the most trivial things. She fights regularly when it comes to chores, for example, and I don't know how to deal with this. What should I do?
Why is this a problem? If there are arguments about chores, and nothing more serious, why assume there is anything that needs to be fixed? You are both adults and, given that you have no real issues that need sorting, it's fair to assume you are both reasonable people. If she argues about chores all the time, isn't it possible that she may have a real grievance that isn't being addressed? Why not take the time to discuss it, find out what you can do to help, and sort it out?

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First Published: 03 August, 2020 05:57 IST


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