She wants to give up on us over a film!

Updated: 13 August, 2020 04:52 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

It was about which movie to watch and she said my choice reflected who I was, which was ridiculous.

Illustration/ Uday Mohite
Illustration/ Uday Mohite

I am a 24-year old and recently began dating a 22-year old girl who goes to the same college I do. We have been together for a few weeks now and had our first argument over something very trivial. It was about which movie to watch and she said my choice reflected who I was, which was ridiculous. I apologised later, but she has this weird idea that we are not compatible because of that movie and I don’t even know how to deal with this. If something so minor can make her behave in this way, should I even try getting into a relationship with her?

What seems like a trivial issue to you may be fairly serious for your girlfriend. Discounting how she feels and why she has reacted in this manner doesn’t solve anything. If you choose to abandon a relationship that is a few weeks old, you are behaving in a manner that could also be referred to as childish. My advice is you accept that what she says has merit and tell her you are willing to understand why she doesn’t see any compatibility. Ask her if she is willing to try and work on this. If she agrees, it will give you both time to understand each other. Successful relationships aren’t always between people who are compatible.

My ex-boyfriend has managed to alienate me from many of my old friends. I want them back, but don’t know how to get them to see that I am not the person they thought I was. What should I do?

Reach out to them one at a time, or all at once, and ask for an opportunity to chat. This cannot be resolved without dialogue. They have to unlearn what they think you are, while you have to convince them that you cannot be defined by your ex-boyfriend.

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First Published: 13 August, 2020 04:53 IST

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