Should I forget the love of my life and move on?
Introducing Dr Love, who solves your relationship riddles in a confusing digital age
I am 25 years old. I was in the process of getting into a relationship, which didn’t work out. I think it’s because I behaved like a freak or a desperate idiot. I used to send her all kinds of messages every morning and evening, until she blocked me on WhatsApp and stopped returning my calls. She said my job was a problem, so I promised to quit soon. There were a few other issues too, which I accepted, because I wanted her to be with me. I really love her, but she doesn’t understand me or my feelings. She has broken my heart and I don’t know if I should laugh it off and be happy that I escaped or cry and wonder how I lost the love of my life. It has been seven years and I haven’t got any closer to a relationship. What should I do?
— Huzefa U
I’m not sure I understand. Has it been seven years since she broke off all contact with you? If it is, you really should move on because I’m pretty sure she has, and it doesn’t seem as if she may change her mind now. If you are worrying about how your behaviour is responsible for that relationship ending, why not use it as a lesson on how to behave in the future instead of obsessing over the past? She may be the love of your life, but she is entitled to her own feelings too, and obviously doesn’t feel the same way about you. If you are worried about getting into any relationship at all, you have to accept the fact that they can take time. You need to meet more people, get to know them better, give them a chance to know you, and take it from there. This doesn’t happen overnight. All you can do is be patient and wait for something to happen. Rushing into something just because you’re worried about being alone at the age of 25 is not a solution.
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