'Should I introduce my mum to my girlfriend?'

Nov 06, 2018, 07:40 IST | Dr Love

She thinks I'm single, and I have never dated anyone before. Is this a good idea?

'Should I introduce my mum to my girlfriend?'

Dr. LoveI would like to surprise my mother by introducing her to my girlfriend. She thinks I'm single, and I have never dated anyone before. Is this a good idea?
Are you referring to your girlfriend, the idea of dating, or act of surprising your mother as a good idea? There is no reason why they shouldn't meet, so I'm not sure I follow. Being open and honest about your relationships is always a good idea, irrespective of who is involved.

I have been in a relationship with a girl who is married and has three children. Initially, she complained that her marriage was not working and that the children were actually her sister's. She said she had adopted them. I recently found out that she had lied. She was married in 2000 and is seven years older than I am, but told me she had married in 2012. I also found out that the children were hers, which devastated me. I am much better now, but don't want to marry her because I suspect everything she says. I can't trust her but can't live without her either. I have lied and told her that I am getting engaged in a few months and she believes me. Should I stick to the lie and stop meeting her? Do you have any suggestions on how I should move on?
- Raashid B
You have both lied to each other, and the nature of these lies is quite mind-boggling, considering there are children involved. Putting aside the additional problem of adultery, I honestly find it hard to understand how either of you thought this could be a good idea with any possible future. If you don't trust her at all, what makes you think this is a healthy relationship? How will the two of you explain this to those three children, who have conveniently been ignored? Even the way you have chosen to end this has been based on a lie. If that doesn't tell you this is a mistake, what will?

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