Want to break up before his birthday

Updated: 01 October, 2020 05:30 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

I don't want to attend, because I know we will have a few arguments later and I don't have any feelings for him anymore

Illustration/ Uday Mohite
Illustration/ Uday Mohite

DR LOveMy boyfriend and I have been having serious problems for a while now. We have tried to resolve them, but nothing seems to work. I think we might break up soon. He has a birthday coming up and wants to throw a big party. I don't want to attend, because I know we will have a few arguments later and I don't have any feelings for him anymore. I want to end our relationship before the birthday so I can get out of attending the party, but my friends say that is cruel. Should I attend it and then break up?

If this has been a problem for a while, it's obvious that you have both managed to keep it together until now. If this party matters to him, it may make sense for you to attend as a final act of goodwill and then end this if there isn't a solution in sight. You have the option of ending it now, obviously, because your friends can't speak for how you are feeling, but you will have to weigh the pros and cons because you and your boyfriend alone are qualified to comment about this.

A friend of mine introduced me to a woman who is divorced, and we hit it off immediately. We have been on a few dates and things are starting to get serious. She has a son with her ex-husband though, and we haven't discussed that and what it means if we decide to get into a relationship. What's it like dating someone with a young child? Will this make it impossible for us to be together?

I suggest you meet her son and spend some time with them both before thinking about this. Any possible relationship between you and this woman will be different from the relationship she already has with her son. This doesn't mean a third relationship involving all three of you is impossible. It takes time to figure out the dynamics, but people manage it very well all the time.

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First Published: 01 October, 2020 05:30 IST

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