We broke up; will I ever fall in love again?

Updated: 30 December, 2017 09:58 IST | Dr Love | Mumbai

It's been eight months since I split with my girlfriend and I wonder if I will ever fall in love again

Illustration/ Uday Mohite

It's been eight months since I split with my girlfriend and I wonder if I will ever fall in love again.
We are programmed to fall in love or be attracted to someone all the time. You just haven't met someone interesting yet

I dated three girls before I met my current girlfriend. I told her about two of them and not about the third because that was an extremely serious relationship that almost ended in marriage. A few days ago, my girlfriend found a letter written to me by that particular ex-girlfriend, which was extremely intimate in nature. When she asked me about it, I was forced to tell her how close we once were. Now, she thinks I have been lying about other relationships too, because I didn't tell her about such a serious one. I tried explaining to her that I didn't mention it because I wanted to forget it, but she doesn't accept that argument. I love my girlfriend a lot and want to spend the rest of my life with her, but how will this work if she doesn't trust me enough? How do I get her to change her mind and be more accepting of this?

This was a pretty serious piece of information to withhold from someone you say you intend to marry. You may have strong reasons for why you chose not to tell her about it, but it will take her time to understand and accept those reasons, simply because of the manner in which she found out about your ex-girlfriend. The only way you can make this easier is with time. She needs to get to a place where she can trust you, while you need to be more open about your feelings and allow her to see things from your point of view. Speak about the past, be clear about why you did what you did, and allow your relationship to get stronger in its own time. That is pretty much all you can do for now.

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First Published: 30 December, 2017 06:33 IST

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