Will I lose friends post break-up?
We decided to end our relationship this month, because things were just not working out, and our friends found out about this and started to avoid us
My boyfriend and I were together for three years and had a large group of friends in common. We used to hang out a lot together, attend the same parties, and became very close. We decided to end our relationship this month, because things were just not working out, and our friends found out about this and started to avoid us. I knew things would be a little awkward for a while, but I am worried now because they don't want to feel as if they have to take sides, which makes them simply hang out without us. I don't know if my boyfriend has said something to them or if he is okay with just not meeting any of them anymore, but I don't want to lose these friendships because I am genuinely fond of some of the people I have come to know over these years. How do I save these relationships after we break up?
This may be awkward for everyone involved only until they find a way of coming to terms with it. It isn't as if they hate you or your boyfriend, as much as it implies confusion about what has happened and how they are supposed to deal with it. Another problem is they probably continue to look at you and your boyfriend as a single unit, rather than two entities with individual personalities. If they appreciate you for who you are, as opposed to simply being someone's girlfriend, they will reach out and re-establish the friendship they once had. If they don't, you should congratulate yourself on not being with people who have been unable to think of you as someone with a mind and personality of your own. I suggest you give them a bit of time though. Don't force any meetings or conversations if they aren't ready for it. Chances are this will resolve itself as they get used to not seeing the two of you as a couple. Until that happens, allow these things to take their course.
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