Mumbai: Matrimonial website for the mentally ill is lighting up lives

On wwwmanomarriagecom applicants have to register with a doctorrsquos certificate and provide complete details regarding their illness Pic for RepresentationNothing is easy for those suffering from neurological diseases least of all finding a life partner And with marriage with such patients still looked down upon it forces them to hide their illness leading to future discord In order to change all that a former student of KEM hospitalrsquos psychiatry department has created a website wwwmanomarriagecom to help such patients find their soul matesApplicants have to register online with a doctorrsquos certificate which gets verified by a team working for the website They must also provide complete details regarding their illness Even those having physical challenges like visual handicap and skin diseases can register on this site In fact a person without any illness can register if she has no qualms about marrying someone suffering from somethingThe website offers a platform for patients to interact voluntarily disclose all facts regarding their illnesses and then go further towards solemnising the match with full understanding and reasonable expectations to avoid disappointments and sufferings for both families said Dr Avinash Joshi who started it a year back now practising in NagpurAlso read Man gets divorce from mentally ill wife who denied him sex for 7 yearsThe main purpose of marriage is not just to have sex and bear children itrsquos also companionship security comforts of home emotional support and caring and sharingThe right fitMeet Abhishek Joshi This 32yearold has been undergoing treatment for paranoid schizophrenia for the last 10 years His parents had been facing an uphill task trying to find a match for him until manomarriagecom A month back they found a suitable girl who suffers from a reproductive illnessWe tried on various sites but people still consider such illnesses a taboo and refuse any alliance On this website we went through a few profiles and found this girl We are in talks for marriage hopefully things will work out said his fatherDr Joshi said that so far 45 people had registered on the website We get patients from across the country he addedSpeaking about one of the recent requests he received for registration he narrated the story of one Vikram Rao a 28yearold engineer hailing from KarnatakaLast year Rao was diagnosed with cancer in his testicles following which the left testicle was removedHe has recovered completely because his cancer was diagnosed at an early stage He didnrsquot even have to undergo chemotherapy But the illness itself coupled with the fact that he has only one testicle stopped anyone from agreeing to get married to him But now he is all geared up to find a match through the website said Dr JoshiDr Avinash JoshiIn this togetherThe good doctor said he has been reaching out to psychiatrists and gynaecologists across the state to join hands and widen the sitersquos reachI have been reaching out to doctors across the state to make all of their patients aware of the website Perhaps this is a better way of rehabilitation two families sharing the load of disability with full transparency preventing future legal battles he saidDr Sagar Mundada a psychiatrist from KEM hospital and president of Indian Medical Association Youth Maharashtra who has joined the campaign with Dr Joshi said Many times people tend to hide their psychiatric problems while going for marriage proposals This increases the stigma around the illness By declaring it in public it helps to establish trust which is crucial for marriage it nullifies any taboo and helps the couple to plan their future well Such an initiative must be appreciatedIts all hushhush Under the carpet inside the closetPsychiatrists say one of the commonest reasons of divorce is at least one partner having some or the other neurological disorder Parents of such patients desperately try to get their children married off somehow shrinks add because they have this belief that their son or daughter will get better after marriage and subsequently they hide about the illness during talks with the other side Ultimately this is what paves the way for future discord between couples they explain Doctors also say that they have seen many cases wherein even the treatment is stopped after marriage either over the same belief that the union will fix the disease or fear over consequences following its revelation leading to a relapse of it in the patient While those who continue to seek treatment after marriage face constant pressure and victimisation