Nawazuddin: I scooped her up in my arms and headed straight for the bedroom

My first relation was like rain after a spell of droughtI was performing in a play in Mumbai which was when I finally had my first romantic relationship Incidentally she too happened to be an NSD graduate though we had never met there It was very sweet like rain is after a very long spell of drought Sunita had fallen madly in love with me Every day she would come over hang out at my house in Mira Road and scrawl our names in tiny font all over the wall Then she went off on a holiday to her home town in the hills to see her folks When she returned Sunita would not take any of my calls And when she did at last I was flabbergasted After such a deep passionate love she simply said Nawaz you focus on your career And I will focus on my career She cut off all contact after that and I plunged into another deep deep depression I took a bucket of fresh white paint and began to replace her artwork on my walls with the blank canvas that they were beforeNawazuddin SiddiquiLiving in Mira Road meant that the local train was our lifeline We were at the station almost all the time Soon after her call one day I was at the station and stood there staring at the tracks A train was coming screaming its arrival with a lusty horn It would be simple and instant Should I jump on to the tracks and end it all End this struggle end this life I had nothing No love no work no money But some being woke up in me and gave me a metaphorical slap You know this is not your department the voice in my head said Then why Why did you go that way Why it screamed at meThe train sped away screaming pompously cutting through the air I decided that I would never again be emotional in any relationship Never again did I allow myself to be vulnerable like that again not even with my wife Yet it was important to analyse what had happened Sunita must have been advised she should probably date someone successful not a struggling desperate actor who was out of work Today Sunita tells everybody that she was once together with me in a very serious relationship Incredible isnt itAlso readNiharika Singh Slams His Raunchy Confessions His Story Is FabricatedWhat happens in New York stays in New YorkThose years between 2006 and 2010 were pretty incredible too The industry had begun to notice me Strangely the West was kinder to me first both in terms of love and work I was at a cafe once with my friend in New York Citys Soho area The stunning waitress kept staring at me You You are an actor she asked a rhetorical question Yes I replied Which film of mine did you see Gangs of Wasseypur She squinted trying to remember No no she said Another film After a few moments she responded Lunchbox We got talking and lets just say what happens in New York stays in New YorkWhy are you not mailing me NawazBefore that came Suzanne a lovely dear Jewish girl from New Jersey who lived in New York City We met there and hit it off She came to Mumbai and began to live with me Every few months she kept extending her visa The shooting of Miss Lovely commenced Suzanne used to accompany me there Then came the day when her visa expired and she needed to return to New York to sort it out She was gone for many months One day while we were shooting a dance scene something happened to my costar Niharika Singh She was suddenly cold went out of her way to maintain a distance from me and began to keep mum I was puzzled She used to be friendlysocial and talk quite a bit I thought it was best to ask her what had happened and so I did not once not twice but several times for several days I invited her over for a homecooked meal a mutton dish which was my speciality She politely agreed and came over Not only did she eat everything that was on her plate but she praised it as wellAlso readNawazuddin Siddiqui makes a shocking revelation about Chitrangada SinghNow you come to my house Nawaz I will cook mutton for you she said warmly For the very first time I went to Niharikas house When she opened the door revealing a glimpse of the house I was speechless with amazement A hundred or so it seemed little candles flickered beautifully She wore soft faux fur looking devastatingly gorgeous her beauty illuminated even more in the candlelight And I being the lusty village bumpkin that I am scooped her up in my arms and headed straight for the bedroom We made passionate love And just like that out of the blue I began a relationship with Niharika Singh a relationship which I did not know then would last for almost one and a half yearsMeantime emails from Suzanne started coming Why are you not mailing me Nawaz Whats wrong I did not respond I trusted my silence would convey what needed to be conveyed When I was checking my inbox one day Niharika happened to see one of her emails Who is this she inquired You know very well who it is I said Its Suzanne Woow Its still going on between you two Amazing Niharika thundered in anger It is wrong I hope you know thatFrom that day Niharika began to send emails to Suzanne from my email address She would type I cannot continue with you and sign off as me Imagine the shock for Suzanne She would send heartbreaking replies After a few of these email exchanges Suzanne figured that this was not my voice at all Who is this writing Nawaz I know this is not you Who is she Who is this bh Bh That word infuriated Niharika so much that she made me end all correspondence with Suzanne forever I was very sad Then I thought so be it its all right I am with Niharika My melancholy evaporated quicklyAlso readNawazuddin Siddiqui was quite nervous to do intimate scenes in Babumoshai BandookbaazI was a rascal who cared only for himselfNiharika was an intelligent girl Being an actor herself meant that she knew and understood my struggle for work She would call me in frequent spurts throughout the day demanding to know of my whereabouts Then The regularity of the questions felt like being nagged nonstop There was another piece to this puzzle Like all girls Niharika obviously expected some of the sweet conversations that lovers have to take place between us But I was quite a selfish bd I had a plain aim go to her house make out and leave I could not talk loveydovey too much It finally struck her that I was a rascal who cared only for himself Actually all the girls I have ever been with have had this same complaint about me I would only come to them for my own needs Otherwise I might not even take their calls When I went to her place next she was wearing a silk robe I ran my hand over its coolness around her waist grabbing her but she pushed me away No Nawaz she said I wont meet you again This is enough I pleaded I cried I apologized But she remained adamant She had had enough So that was that we broke up cutting off all contact Two months later another girl came into my life in a most mysterious way I did not know then that years later I would marry herExcerpts from Siddiquis tellall biography An Ordinary Life PenguinViking 2017Watch videoNawazuddin Siddiqui reveals the kind of lover he is in real life