Waterpipe, the new hookah place at Girgaum Chowpatty, needs a serious ventilation overhaul because you don't need to shell out cash for the hookah here if you want to smoke, just inhale

Disney named him Absolem -- Hebrew for the Father of Peace -- but it's no secret that Lewis Carroll's Hookah-Smoking Caterpillar in Alice in Wonderland abounds with scandalous symbolism. In the book, lying comfortably atop a large mushroom as he puffs on a hookah, the blue caterpillar asks Alice, "Who are you?" and she answers, "I hardly know, sir, just at present -- at least I know who I was when I got up this morning, but I think I must have been changed several times since then."



Is it a collective identity crisis that's drawing Mumbai's youth to haunts like Waterpipe or a sheer dearth of centres for constructive activity, one wonders -- we used to have a bowling alley but that's gone now, and summer-jobs, of course, are unheard of in South Mumbai. But then again, perhaps it's just IPL fever. After all, the place does have a flat-screen TV -- one on each of the two levels, in fact. With dense fog cloaking the wall-mounted sets though, one's ability to watch the game here seems nothing short of a miracle -- the fact that patrons aren't walking into each other or the walls seems nothing short of a miracle.

From what we could make out, the ground floor resembles a wooden cabin and the level upstairs is predominantly white with abstract splashes of colour on one wall. Hookahs (they've got everything from fruity blends to supari-flavoured concoctions) will cost you Rs 400 on the ground floor and Rs 450 on the top-level.

Although one is at a loss to understand why -- neither space has windows or oxygen cylinders. It's not the tidiest diner either. But, impressively, at least the monochromatic, unisex restroom was immaculate. And while it simply wouldn't be right to allow this 100% pure-vegetarian eatery to pass for an Italian bistro the Margherita Pizza (Rs 200) was undeniably edible. Both, the Paprika Pasta (Rs 250) and the Risotto Al Porcini (Rs 280) lacked salt, but while the penne was doused in a hot-cream-sauce, the over-cooked risotto had no taste at all. The mushrooms and every trace of their flavour had completely disappeared into the tidal wave of cream that had clearly struck this unfortunate dish.

At Waterpipe, 134, Bhatia Building, Loyalka Marg, near Balbulnath Petrol Pump, behind Spices & Flavours, Girgaum Chowpatty Bandstand.
Call 23623131, 23633131
Timings 10.30 am to 11.50 pm