Rosalyn D'Mello: Travelling with only the absolute

The absolute mdash thats the accessory I want to carry with me everywhere I go I see no point in traveling without it Representation PicThinkstockThe wallpaper on my desktop for the last four months has been Virginia Woolfs A Room of Ones Own With a skyblue backdrop in the foreground a threewalled structure like a theatrical set with three items of furniture and their accompanying shadows a green armchair opposite which lies a lifesize fountain pen with the tip of its golden nib positioned achingly towards the ceiling between which is a daisylike blue flower with a similarly golden coreI am drawn to the image because of its reductive properties how it illustrates a complex idea in the form of simple everyday objects that belong to the world of the writer The two Os in the titular Room comingle to assume the mathematical signifier of infinity while the dark looming shadows cast by a golden yellow orb that sits atop the centre communicates a foreboding sense of weight There is a sense of boundlessness despite the finitude of the room The image has become familiar but every now and then I find myself staring at it as if it were capable of eliciting epiphaniesRight now because I upon returning from the recent Khoj residency in Goa decided to reconfigure my bedroom spatially signalling the official beginning of my next book The Miracle of the Loaves and the Fish placed my writing desk directly against the wall containing my window the tension between the interiority of my world and the exterior that lies beyond the expanse of my windowpanes is more exaggerated than ever beforeSince my most recent return a few days ago from a brief sojourn in Bombay on account of a friends wedding and anothers engagement I seem to have taken myself hostage within this room My only voluntary outdoor expedition in the last 72 hours was to go to the VFS office in Shivaji Stadium to put in my application for the Schengen visa for my upcoming trip to Europe My imshymshyeshydiate fate lies in the hands of the German embassy and until I know for sure whether I have their permission to go Im straddling the length and breadth of a limboWithin this liminal zone of uncertainty I have been preoccupied with the notion of weight It began as more of a practical endeavour My whimsical itinerary will have me moving between Germany France Greece and Turkey which means multiple flights and trains So I feel the urge to travel light to avoid having to lug around too many extra kilos Having travelled extensively with a photographer as a companion Ive felt quite blessed that my art doesnt necessitate the transportation of heavy gear that it is not dependent on machinery for its efficacy But I have also always envied artists and their relationship with materiality As writers we peddle in ideas in the intangibility and evasiveness of words Were like hobbyists with butterfly nets chasing the ever illusive the never containedThat doesnt mean however that we dont have the same issues with luggage Its just that most of our baggage is invisible My biggest predicament when I have to travel for longer than two weeks is how to fit the enormity of the diverse fragments of thought that at this present moment are confined within the sanctum sanctorum of my room nestled among the innumerable pages of my many many diaries resting among my bookshelves encrypted upon the dregs of layers of peeled paint How do I collect all these insubstantial objects and fit them within the parameters of my humble baggage allowance of 20 to 23 kilos Especially when this trip I intend to make is no ordinary vacationThe religious bribe the gods with promises on condition that their prayers are answered Some say they will pilgrimage to a temple solely on their knees if a sick loved one is healed Some make indulgeshynces to offer money to the disenfranchised if only the god in question lets their child pass its final examsIrreligious as I often am I had only promised myself three years ago that after I published my first book I would treat myself to a trip to Europe While I am tempted to bribe a god to ensure I get my visa Ive decided to surrender instead to whatever the stars will have foretoldWhat Im always anxious about when Im traveling to a foreign land is the dilemma of how to translate ones self across continents when its often so difficult to transcribe it among the bylanes of what we call homeI chanced upshyon a marvellous fragment in Frieshydrich Schlegels Lucinde There are writers who drink the absolute like water and books in which even the dogs refer to the infinite The absolute thats the accessory I want to carry with me everywhere I go I see no point in traveling without itDeliberating on the life and times of Everywoman Rosalyn DMello is a reputable art critic and the author of A Handbook For My Lover She tweets RosaParx Send your feedback to mailbagmiddaycom