I want to wait till I'm ready, they want us wed NOW!

Dear Diana,
I am 24. I live and work in Mumbai. My girlfriend and I have been together three years. She is a bit orthodox as

Illustration/Sameer Pawar

her parents have been very strict and uptight about her upbringing. I, on the other hand, am a laidback, happy-go-lucky person who has had wonderful, understanding, not-so-stuck-up parents. We have talked about marriage. But while I'd rather wait a year or two before tying the knot, they want her to get wed ASAP. They 'approve of' me but aren't willing to let her wait. I've even offered to get engaged to allay their fears but to no avail. I am at my wit's end. Any suggestions?

Name withheld

Dear Friend,
Seeing how it's gonna be a bit of a struggle convincing her parents that it isn't that simple to get married before putting certain things into place, you will have to get you parents to talk to her parents and explain you point of view and see how it goes from there. If you're offering to commit to her, I don't see a problem at all. I think waiting a year or two is perfectly reasonable. Nothing to get too troubled about. Really don't ponder too much about this whole thing. First get your parents to try and sort it out.

She doesn't want protection and gets nervous

Dear Diana,
I am 27, my girlfriend is 24. We've been in a sexual relationship for four years now. We have sex twice a month but she refuses to let me use condoms. After sex, she gets nervous about a possible pregnancy. If I ask her to take contraceptive pills, she refuses.We haven't talked about marriage yet. How do I deal with this?