Dear Diana,

These past few days, I have been suspecting my wife of five years of cheating on me with an old friend she caught up with online. I first caught wind of it when her instant messenger kept buzzing far often than usual. I usually don't pry when she's using the computer as I respect her privacy but that day, I couldn't control myself and found myself also looking at her Facebook and Orkut accounts.
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I found out that she had several male friends added, most of whom I didn't know. I'm normally a very reasonable man but this has me confused. She still behaves like I mean the world to her. But these conversations she has saved in her folders prove that she has very personal chats about her married life with these guys who are complete strangers (to me). How should I deal with this?

Name withheld



Dear Friend,

I guess you could simply confront her with the 'evidence'. But being together as long as you have, I really do not see that going down well. I really don't see the fuss about your wife having friends you have no idea about. Don't we all add friends on social networking sites all the time jus t becasue they're friends of friends? It's not like it's a crime or anything.

You might be on to something with the saved conversations or maybe not. If she wanted to cheat on you, she would never keep the 'evidence' in a place you would have easy access to. I guess talking to her calmly about this, would sort things out. Jumping to conclusions will get you nowhere and will only make matters worse.

Are first impressions, last impressions?

Dear Diana,

The other day, I read somewhere that most people make up their minds about someone on the first date itself. Does that mean, first impressions are last impressions?