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Don’t know if we’ll end up together...

If you are being irrational or jealous, and can’t trust the person you’re with, nothing she says can change how you feel about this relationship. Communication, honesty, and trust are the foundations of any strong bond, and you seem to have none

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Illustration/Uday Mohite

Illustration/Uday Mohite

My girlfriend and I are the same age and have been dating for two years. Our parents have met each other, too, and like each other. The implication is that we will eventually marry, so they are very welcoming to both of us whenever we visit each other’s homes. The problem is, my girlfriend and I don’t know if this is a long-term relationship. We like each other a lot, obviously, but don’t feel the kind of strong attraction that is needed to spend the rest of our lives with each other. We have spoken honestly about this and are both sure that we will move on to other people if we feel like it, or if we feel our priorities are different. We don’t know how to get our parents to understand this, because they just treat us as part of their families and also spend time with each other as if they are already related. It makes things very awkward for my girlfriend and myself. How do we resolve this?
You do your parents a disservice by assuming they won’t be able to cope if the two of you decide to end this relationship. The easiest way to avoid awkwardness is to be as honest with them as you are with each other. Not saying anything simply adds to the misconceptions they may already have.

I want to break up with my girlfriend because I recently saw her get very friendly with another guy at a party. She says she is just outgoing by nature, but I don’t think that was just flirting. I have lost trust in her since then and don’t seem to take anything she says seriously. Should I end it even if she says I am being irrational and jealous?
If you are being irrational or jealous, and can’t trust the person you’re with, nothing she says can change how you feel about this relationship. Communication, honesty, and trust are the foundations of any strong bond, and you seem to have none.

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