I recently got into a fight with my boyfriend, and it ended with him saying something extremely insulting to me. He apologised a lot later and is genuinely sorry, but I have been shocked because I didn’t think he was capable of saying something so horrible. It has made me question a lot of things about him because I feel as if there is a part of him I know nothing about. He always came across as well-behaved and decent, but that moment of anger revealed something that was ugly and disturbing. I have not been able to see him the same way since our fight, and I feel as if our relationship has changed. How do I address this? Should I try and make it seem as if everything is normal so we can still be together?
You may still love your boyfriend and may want to save this relationship, but what has happened can’t be brushed aside if it’s still on your mind. If you feel as if you don’t know him well enough, that needs to be addressed, and you should keep talking about what has happened because it’s an unresolved issue. Anger can make us say things that are against our nature, but if you’re disturbed and it’s affecting how you see him, ask for an explanation and talk about your feelings. This may go away with time, but not if you aren’t prepared to have an honest discussion about what happened and where his comment came from.

A colleague of mine knows I like her, but she has a boyfriend. This doesn’t prevent her from flirting with me. What should I do?
You should consider calling it out if her behaviour is making you uncomfortable. Misunderstandings can lead to unpredictable circumstances, some of which may be bad for you professionally, so it’s important to establish boundaries and be as clear as possible. Have a chat with her about why you’re confused and try clearing the air in as respectful a manner as possible.