I am getting mixed signals...

I have been dating someone who says he needs time to think about our relationship. We have gone out four or five times and were okay with the idea of getting together, but he says he isn’t sure because he thinks I am not the person he thought I was. I have asked for a better explanation, but he says he isn’t sure what to say. It feels as if he is looking for an excuse to break up with me, but he is not being open or direct about it. A few days ago, he spoke about the possibility of going on a holiday together and I am just confused because I am getting mixed signals. I know we have feelings for each other, which is the only reason I haven’t given up on this already. Should I wait and give him time to understand what is going on, or give him an ultimatum? If he can’t give me a reasonable explanation for his behaviour, should I assume this won’t work out?
If he isn’t being clear about where things stand, he can ask for time. If he is sending you mixed signals, he is either confused about his own feelings or assuming that you will work around what he’s going through. Either way, given that this is a new situation for you both, it may make sense for you to step back and insist on clarity. If he has time to figure out where things stand, he may be able to articulate what the problem is. If he doesn’t have an answer after a point, it will be easier for you both to walk away without causing too much pain. Setting your own boundaries is best because it can allow you to minimise the effect of this instability and give you some kind of protection from what may be hurtful behaviour. There’s nothing wrong with being indecisive or asking for time, provided you take into account that this can have an impact on your mental health. 

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