Tell her about this possibility and allow her to consider if this relationship is worth saving. If she doesn’t attempt to change, your future with her doesn’t seem secure
Illustration/Uday Mohite
I have a problem with the way my girlfriend behaves whenever we are at a party. She drinks too much and starts to get very aggressive with people, which makes things very embarrassing for me. I have tried to get her to see things from my perspective, but she accuses me of trying to control who she is. I am not, because I always point out that this reflects badly on me too. My friends all say I need to tell her that she is out of control and can’t handle alcohol, but she doesn’t even take what I say seriously because she starts to imagine that I am not letting her live her life the way she wants to. I am starting to worry about the future of our relationship because I don’t know how much longer I can be this patient. What should I do?
If your girlfriend has a problem with alcohol and refuses to acknowledge it, the possibility of her being able to cope with it are slim. Addiction of any sort has an adverse impact not only on the person, but on people close to the person. The fact that there is a refusal to have any conversation about this also restricts your options. It’s okay for her to see this as your attempt at controlling her, but it’s not okay to dismiss your concerns using that as an excuse either. There has to be some middle ground, and an attempt to deal with this like adults. If things don’t improve, you won’t be able to hold on to this relationship because your frustration may turn to anger. Tell her about this possibility and allow her to consider if this relationship is worth saving. If she doesn’t attempt to change, your future with her doesn’t seem secure.
My girlfriend wants me to spend more time with her parents, but I don’t like them much. How do I get out of this?
You can be honest or give them another chance on her behalf.
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