Prateik Babbar: I was surrounded in vomit. It's a miracle I survived

Prateik BabbarI am that 30yearold Bollywood chap the son of legendary actor Smita Patil who passed away few days after childbirth born into the family of Raj Babbar with a legacy to honour But up until now I was only embarrassed guilty and misplaced People know me as Prateik Babbar but dont know my story Even today I fear retribution liability and trial Some of this may have been deserved at one time but today my story is one of success It is a story of optimism fortitude celebration and resurgence I share this account so that my fans family and friends can hear of the isolating allconsuming nature of addiction its treacherous grasp and the determination that helped me emerge from this terrorising infirmityMy relationship with addiction is not the result of a solitary event or lack of resolve Addiction of any sort is a complex disease and I mean disease in its literal sense It comes with physical and psychological symptoms both of which act as stimuli encouraging relapses Unfortunately the only treatment available is lifetime adherence to sobrietyMy struggle with drugs started before high school Sports and music were constructive escapes for a while but they could only suffice for so long My first real drug was a disturbed childhood Constantly faced with internal dilemma the voices in my head debating where I belong and who I am drugs came disguised as a glitzy escape As years went by I got acquainted with the narcotic underbelly which led me to my first runin with drugs at the age of 13Also readPrateik Babbar on battle with drug addiction Im work in progressAlthough I was boisterous as a child I was also introverted and often withdrew from social obligations When I discovered drugs I thought I found a remedy to becoming more amiable Drugs would dull my emotions But like sports and music it provided only temporary reprieve giving me a feeling of conquest like Im ready to take on the world But when the high disappeared I threw something else in the mix to combat the comedown I wasnt consuming drugs at night like partygoers do as a superficial part of their lifestyle I was using it in the morning to get myself through the day I needed it to exist Perhaps the most widespread delusion about addiction is the amount of time it can take for someone to become an addict The cinemas tell you it happens right after the first hit but addiction like any disease progressesWhile others who took drugs got fed up with it I unfortunately got addicted People turn judgmental when youve got a drug problem Also you dont want to admit the fact that you do While I could chalk up my primary encounter with other drugs marijuana and hashish to experiments the inquisitiveness led to recurrent use over time By the time I was in my freshman year seniors introduced me to the world of acid cocaine and ecstasy What started off as a few pills every couple of days soon spiralled into uncontrolled consumption I wouldnt say I was naiumlve to the effects of drug dependence but I certainly wasnt prepared for what followed withdrawal symptoms that were worse than any hangover Getting out of bed was almost impossible nausea greeted me each morning my body ached and I oscillated between hot and cold every few minutes At that point I didnt even have a drug of choice I took whatever I could lay my hands onI was a fool who permitted love to drive me to selfdestruction all the while hoping I could find what I missed while growing up love and acceptance But when the joyride ended it seemed like the worst karmic decision My rebound was not a onenight stand It was drugs an excess of it Women with conditions came and left but drugs didntAlso readPrateik Babbar Will make Smita Patil proud wont rest till I doBut it seems I was Gods special child He was not going to give up on me even if the world did A drug overdose made me sit up and take note of the monster I had become Im not religious but at that moment I encountered my first experience of spirituality A heady cocktail rendered me unconscious with my face down on the bedroom floor I was surrounded in vomit and regained consciousness only 24 hours later Its a miracle I survived The thought of going cold turkey had crossed my mind before but the thirst to chase the initial high surpassed every rational thought I couldnt recognise the man I saw in the mirror I realised I hadnt looked myself in the eye ever since I started getting high Following multiple episodes that made me feel like a miserable prisoner of drugs I decided to finally seek professional help My family refused to see their loved one attempt to slowly kill himself and encouraged me to sign up for rehabAlso readPrateik Babbar to start dosa businessI had no preconception about what awaited me but given the nausea pain and insomnia among other withdrawal symptoms I was up for anything Drugs had consumed my brain to such an extent that even after a detox it continued to hold some real estate up there I spent three weeks in rehab trying to convince everyone I had beaten my addiction But now I am stronger confident that whatever tribulations befall me I will healI am certain that I will wrestle my need for drugs even on my best days but the only way to keep cynicism at bay is by sharing the emotions that fueled my addiction in the first place That is also the first reason for scripting this piece The second is to break the stigma associated with addiction This stigma I always feared would define me for the rest of my life I want to tell every addict that there is assistance I cant promise that it will be easy but I can assure you that it will be simpler than following a life that will eventually destroy you and everything you loveAlso readSajid Nadiadwala relaunches Prateik Babbar in Baaghi 2Detention doesnt work Rehabilitation is important You must amend an addicts thought process and give him mandatory programmes that can enable him to live life differentlyToday I have been clean of drugs for one year I cant be grateful enough for today My priorities are redefined If I were to lose someone dear or get replaced in a project my sobriety could fall apart Its upon me to hold it together Thinking about how I will manage to stay sober for the rest of my life is daunting but staying sober just for today doesnt seem so badPhotos Raj Babbar celebrates birthday with sons Prateik Arya