Dear Diana,
I'm a 37-year-old divorcee. After my marriage broke up five years ago, I've stayed away from women and kept to myself. My mother is insisting that I should marry again and forget the past. I registered with a matrimonial site and got a proposal from a woman who is a year younger to me and is a divorcee too. Though my folks feel she is a good choice, the horror of my first marriage still haunts me. How do I overcome this phobia?
— Aalish


Illustration/ Amit Bandre 

Dear Aalish,
For you, it is a case of once bitten, twice shy. You do not want to go through the nightmare again, so it is better to be safe than sorry. As she is also a divorcee, she will want to play safe too. Before taking a decision, it is vital that you honestly tell the girl about your fears. Chances are that she may have her own set of fears. Once you feel that you are compatible, take the relationship to the next level. Your mother wants you to be happy again. Just because your first marriage was a disaster, it does not mean that your second one will also end up in a mess. Go with an open mind and make it work.