These tips may help you understand your partners better emotionally

Weve all been there the stage when we are falling in love with a person and everything feels so perfect An expert says Its perfectly normal to go through this process but what happens next How do we mature from this infatuation into something more stable and sustainable How do we manage to deal with our partners flaws once we get past the butterfliesinthestomach stageChandni Tugnait a psychotherapist life and business coach and founderdirector of Gateway of Healing says there are many reasons why people become emotionally unavailable to their partners Tugnait talks about what one can do about this disconnect Getting too caught up in the infatuation phaseFalling head over heels for someone isnt everyones cup of tea Some people enter relationships rather slowly taking time to really get to know the other person and letting themselves fall slowly whereas others rush into relationships and focus only on the good things To some extent all of us have rosetinted glasses on when we are infatuated with someone everything about our new loveinterest feels perfect therefore we conclude that they must be right for us We might also tend to neglect the issues in the relationship as a whole because we are driven by an intense need for completion that makes it hard for us to see things objectively For this reason people can get disappointed in their partners once they come out of this infatuation stage simply because they expect certain things from them that were never established No personal boundariesSetting your own boundaries is something that many of us struggle with especially in romantic relationships It can feel scary to put a certain distance between you and your partner and it can be hard to find that right balance between getting too close and being suffocated by the relationship However having solid boundaries would allow you to enjoy this relationship while not losing yourself in it They have unrealistic expectationsHaving realistic expectations about what you are entering into when you start a serious relationship is very important for the success of the relationship A lot of people tend to set themselves up for failure as they create unrealistic expectations for example they might expect their partner to always be available and willing to put their relationship first leaving other things aside Having problems accepting your own flawsThe best way for your partner not to feel overwhelmed by your flaws is simply by first accepting them yourself There are many people who refuse to take responsibility for some of the things they do wrong in relationships yet they still get upset when their loved ones point out those flaws which in turn fuels the conflict between them It is also very important to be empathetic towards your partner and try to understand their point of view so that you can establish a healthy communication They stop putting in effortPutting in some sort of effort is what will keep relationships alive When people stop trying to make things work it usually means that they have lost interest in the relationship but still want to hold on to it for as long as possible usually because they are afraid of being alone or lonely They start thinking that they dont deserve betterA lot of us enter new relationships with the idea that we dont deserve someone better and therefore we end up accepting all sorts of unacceptable behaviour from our partners We might even be in this situation ourselves Think about that for a second when you think that you dont deserve better it means that one day you will stop making an effort to find someone who is actually good for you because deep down the idea that they are as good as it gets still lingers They stop seeing their partners flawsA relationship can only work if both people acknowledge each others flaws and learn how to deal with them accordingly For example if your partner has anger management issues much care needs to be taken so they dont lash out at you when they get mad or hold a grudge after they calm down However this can only happen if both partners are willing to talk about their flaws and improve the way they act on them They dont express their feelingsEven when it comes to expressing our feelings some people tend to take things too far by saying everything that pops into their head without thinking or saying nothing and suppressing it all This usually results in an overload or lack of information respectively that makes it hard for anyone to keep up with whats going on The worst part is that this never allows your partner to fully understand how you feel so they wont be able to comfort you and help you through difficult situations Expressing yourself is very important as you learn about what bothers you and how you can fix it while enabling your partner to understand and comfort you They start thinking that they dont deserve to be happyAgain this goes back to the point we talked about earlier when you think that you dont deserve better and therefore end up accepting all kinds of bad behaviour from your partner This also leads to a feeling of apathy because no matter what happens your life will always remain stuck in the same place where it is hard for anything new or exciting to happen This in turn makes you feel unhappy They try taking control over their relationshipThis usually happens when people are afraid of losing their loved ones so they try doing whatever it takes in order to keep them around as long as possible However trying to control every aspect of a relationship usually results in a lack of communication emotionally suffocating the partner nagging sulking and prevents any kind of healthy relationship from emerging They isolate themselvesBeing emotionally unavailable to the point when you stop having friends can be very dangerous because when there is no one around to support you it will be harder for your partner to do so as well This makes the situation even worse because it becomes more and more difficult for anyone to help you break out of that vicious cycle They are simply lazySome people are unable to complete tasks or maintain good habits once they stop thinking about what would happen if they fail at something For instance its easy to cancel your plans last minute a couple of times but as those habits stack up over time your partner will start feeling that their presence does not matter much and this usually leads to an emotionally abusive relationship They think the grass is greener on the other sideSome people always want more no matter what Often it results in their relationships deteriorating because they seek for better things outside even if they already have everything in and around them Over time you can develop an attitude of constantly wanting something else or expecting too much from your partner as well and this may cause them to feel less loved by you They lose themselves along the waySometimes we forget about our feelings or desires because we let ourselves get carried away with daytoday chores This usually happens after longterm relationships where partners start feeling like they cannot do anything without having their significant other around all the time to support them and make everything better In the end its hard to feel like you have your own identity because the other person starts taking too much control over your life They get comfortable with the routineSome people dont know how to get out of a rut so they do nothing about it and this results in them feeling stuck with their partner on an emotional level as well This usually happens when one becomes complacent with the current situation and stops caring about improving things between them If you let these opportunities for change slip away from you what would remain is simply a relationship that no longer exists or one that doesnt have value anymore They become toxic themselvesSometimes people just become emotionally unavailable because of their own issues which stem from past experiences or by being exposed to those experiencing them for too long If you surround yourself with destructive people sooner or later you will start developing a lifestyle based on toxicity which would invariably be unfavourable for everybody around youAlso Read These three tips may help you optimise stress sleep and immunityThis story has been sourced from a third party syndicated feed agencies Midday accepts no responsibility or liability for its dependability trustworthiness reliability and data of the text Midday managementmiddaycom reserves the sole right to alter delete or remove without notice the content in its absolute discretion for any reason whatsoever