Meenakshi Shedde: Diwali 'saf-suf'

IllustrationUday MohiteI live in a modest home So it feels wonderful when friends say they like it so much that it has the energy of a free single womanrsquos home warm and welcoming It is airy mostly bathed in light the walls are lined with books DVDs and little black film review diaries from floor to ceiling But my balcony is my palace lined with plants and flowers it overlooks an ancient elegant rain tree the love of my life whom I hug every now and then So proud am I of this house therersquos even a Postit outside saying lsquoRepublic of MeenakshirsquoNow Irsquom not a fan of Diwali lsquosafsufrsquo mdash autumn cleaning rather than spring cleaning but I feel obliged to attempt it at least Irsquom trying Marie Kondorsquos decluttering mantra does this thing spark joy If not out it goes Irsquom better and more ruthless doing this for others I recently helped a close friend in Sydney clear out her kitchen calmly cutting her ldquobut my friend specially made this chutney for merdquo mdash with a ldquoyes or nordquoInvariably safsuf turns into a philosophical affair for me I noticed cobwebs on the bathroom window shutter frame Irsquod already chased the poor spiders from my other rooms I thought let them at least shelter in my bathroom shutters They donrsquot bother anyone and anyway with the late showers I could hardly send them into the rainI have a terrible conscience with rats though Every year when it pours heavily and rainwater floods the back garden including their ratholes they shinny up the drainpipes mdash climbing till the sixth floor mdash to nestle in apartments until the water recedes Irsquove no idea why when squirrels and rats are both rodents squirrels are cute and rats are ugh ldquoRats really need to fire their entire PR departmentrdquo someone wrote on quoracom Now if they managed quietly in a corner thatrsquos one thing But they keep knocking over pots and pans in the kitchen in the middle of the night My maid laughed at my blearyeyed indecision Arre madam bas ek chuhakakek ratcake lana she advised When I went to buy it the local grocer said we donrsquot stock anything that kills we are Jains Anyway the cake instructions said eating it would make a rat very thirsty and it would race out in search of water mdash so far it has invariably workedAnd Irsquom most grateful to my lizard friend for walloping all the mosquitoes I am rather irritated by women who shriek and jump into menrsquos arms when they see a lizard When I lived in Delhi years ago I once stayed in the large home of a tango teacher in Gulmohar Park and made friends with her resident lizards One of them sweetly introduced me to her baby It was fascinating watching them on the slanting ventilator glass from my desk below Pale white like tiny dinosaurs with dainty toes the entire family would stoically gobble up all the mosquitoes that had been troubling meI recently went to a lunch with ladies who had visited their teenage sons who were living in chummeries in the US with a personal bedroom but sharing the drawing room and kitchen They were horrified to see things growing in the sink and filthy higgledypiggledy rooms mdash ldquothings were piled so high on the bed Irsquom not sure there was a bedrdquoAh well I can see my own bed so Irsquom grateful for small merciesMeenakshi Shedde is South Asia Consultant to Berlin Film Festival awardwinning critic curator to festivals worldwide and journalist Reach her at meenakshisheddegmailcom