Let’s get right to it; ladies, we’re sorry. By we, I mean men. And by “sorry” I mean “for 65 billion years of putting the man (and men) in mean”. We have been evil (or as they say in Dyslexic, vile) to you, ever since evolution split the first ever asexual cell into male and female cells, and the male turned to the female and said “Woman, get in that nucleus and make me a zygote”. Today that male cell is named Om Prakash Chautala. And that female cell is a Satyameva Jayate episode.

I’ve never understood why men have spent all of known history searching for creative ways to be mean to women. Cavemen hit cave-women over the head with clubs, nomadic tribesmen sold women into slavery, and Madhur Bhandarkar keeps putting them in his movies. We are unflinchingly horrible to them, and we’re just getting worse.