Ranjona Banerji: Putin can fly, Modi fights gators

A protester holds up a sign against US President Donald Trump in Chicago PicAFPWelcome to the world of Alternative Facts Itrsquos not a new world Itrsquos not a world we have never lived in before Before the US reached it some of us in other countries had our fill of it But it is an apt new term for which many congratulations are in order for Kellshyyanne Conway adviser to the new US President Donald Trump I am guessing many rightwingers all over the world including those in our fine land must be kicking themselves for not coming up with ldquoAlternative Factsrdquo themselves Yes we have accepted ldquoposttruthrdquo but it has a very academic distant feel to it George Orwell would have been proud of ConwayTrumprsquos Alternative Facts are pretty cute so far They demonstrate how the truly insignificant rules the collective interest how many people attended his inauguration ceremony compared to that of his predecessorrsquos In Trumpland his was the biggest inauguration ever In reality the turnout was sufficient but modest compared to that for President Barack Obama But how dare How can you suggest such a thingHow dare you question whether the President of the United States should be bothered about something like crowd size Isnrsquot that the most obvious and important subject Size is everything for leaders who are full of themselves And donrsquot we know itIn Indiarsquos posttruth world the approach is to manipulate crowd pictures by adding people into them and posting them on social media It helps present an alternative fact for how else can you prove that a majority of identical twins did not attend a Narendra Modi election rally This has been a very successful strategy in India so farOther methods are to morph the prime ministerrsquos face on to the body of some hapless teaseller to prove the PM was a teaseller in his youth And if any evil nonModi supporter puts up a photograph of empty chairs at the venue of a Modi rally how hard is it to claim that the empty chairs are also Modi supportersThe reigning emperor of this metshyhod of life mdash of existing in an alternate reality mdash is Russian President Vladimir Putin He grapples with bears and aeroplanes or something rides barechested on horses across the Siberian Tundra and we have no doubt he flies around the planet at least once every single day putting out firesAdmirers of the North Korean system of government may get very upset right about now mdash and many of them live permanently on social media for the express purpose of getting upset But the sad nonalternative fact is that Kim Jongunrsquos hairstyle precludes taking him seriously as a major lsquoAlternativerrsquo despite his finger on the nuclear button After all Trump Modi and Putin all have their fingers on this button As does Pakistan and as will Marine Le Pen if she wins FrancePut all those names together and the idea of a parallel reality becomes so attractive I make no statement on China because China is China The good thing about ldquostrongrdquo leaders is that they are all the same And the bigger the media gets the more ldquoalternative factrdquo they become Left or Right makes no difference I say this in the sense that Russia is possibly Left or maybe Right but Putin is certainly a Big Strong Leader who Grapples with Bears and WinsModi as a child grappled with alligators and crocodiles and won Kim Jongun never lost against anything and Trump is the most powerful man in the whole world but especially in the United States of America which is the greatest country in the world with the greatest people except that there may be other great people elsewhere in the world as he said a couple of days ago Trump is therefore also the best at adding a qualification to his sweeping claims Some might argue that this does not quite put him in Putin or Modirsquos category as neither admits to mistakes errors or wrongdoingsAfter all when did you last hear the Indian prime minister expressing regret for the fact that people have been dying and suffering because of his demonic demonetisation debacle PM Modirsquos contention is that if anyone suffered they did it happily singing his praises all the way to their deathbeds And all his supporters have applauded the scheme as they stepped over dead bodies on their way to their fancy carsAnyway I just want to point out that I have written this from MarsRanjona Banerji is a senior journalist You can follow her on Twitter ranjona Send your feedback to mailbagmiddaycom