<img style="float: left;" title="Rahul Da Cunha" src="http://images.mid-day.com/images/images/2014/nov/rahul-da-cunha.jpg" alt="Rahul Da Cunha" />You&rsquo;re going mad now. I can feel it. Singham Returns. And so does our beloved Lord Ganeshji.
Fervour combined with fanaticism is even better with a dash of the filmi touch.
Aata majhi satakli plays through my loudspeakers straight into your head. So do hits from Yeh Jawaani Hai Dewaani. And you&rsquo;re going mad now.
I stand atop this truck. Like Napoleon on the high seas surveying the endless possibilities. For the next 11 days, this is my playground to do as I please.
What are you going to do about it?
<img title="Lalbaughcha Raja " src="http://images.mid-day.com/images/images/2014/nov/07Lalbaughcha-Raja.jpg" alt="Lalbaughcha Raja " /> Thousands throng the Lalbaug area as the idol of Lalbaughcha Raja makes its entry during Ganeshotsav this year 
Bhajans now need a background score. All these &lsquo;keertans&rsquo; dating back to my Nani&rsquo;s time are so outdated.
I've heard the argument that Ganesh Chaturthi should be a quiet, spiritual experience. Well, I challenge that. No more private repose, I demand public raada-beeda.
You&rsquo;re thinking, apart from a plaster of Paris sculpture of Ganapati, there&rsquo;s nothing holy about this festival anymore, right? Plus, a revolving neon light. Devotion to dholaks to disco.
You see, Ganesh Chaturthi isn&rsquo;t only about expressing devotion, it is about proving that my Dadagiri is the biggest. From Tuesday I will go back to my regular life of hardship. But for today, I am Atilla the Hun, I am Aurangzeb, I am an avatar of the Almighty.
I will position my pandal in the middle of the road and gyrate to Yo Yo Honey Singh&rsquo;s lyrics. You see, I may have an idol in my vehicle but I am an Indian Idol. And there&rsquo;s nothing you can do. So what if your car ride from the top of Carter Road to Shirley Rajan takes as long as a Rath Yatra through Uttar Pradesh? You will wait, our God says so, I say so.
Because this is not Ganeshhood, this is gundagardi.
You&rsquo;re getting frustrated na, you want the Elephant God, to put his large foot down and crush this madness. I can see it in your eyes. You hate me.
But we are in charge now. What are you going to do about it ?
Understand, that for 11 days I will be democratic about my dictatorship. My noisy celebrations will disturb hospitals, homes for the aged, housing societies, hutments, high rises, it doesn&rsquo;t matter. So patients, pets, people of all ages and communities will be deafened equally.
What are you going to do about it?
The 11 o&rsquo;clock &lsquo;shut the noise&rsquo; rules goes out the window, it doesn&rsquo;t extend to us.
There was a time when Ganesh Chaturthi meant innocent vim and vigour. Today, volatility has hit Vesuvius proportions.
I want to disturb Mumbai city. I want to drive everybody crazy. All in God&rsquo;s name.
I don&rsquo;t just want to commercialise religion. I want to corrupt it.
I don&rsquo;t want to change content. Just form. Because I can.
Supplication has a new name. It is called anarchy.
What are you going to do about it?
Rahul da Cunha is an adman, theatre director/playwright, photographer and traveller. Reach him at rahuldacunha62 @gmail.com
The views expressed in this column are the individual&rsquo;s and don&rsquo;t represent those of the paper.

You're going mad now. I can feel it. Singham Returns. And so does our beloved Lord Ganeshji.

Aata majhi satakli

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Aata majhi satakli

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