Escape to nature

When people talk about escaping into nature they never seem to mean the beach nor pineapplecoloured cocktails No greenery has copyrighted the nature businessAs no one expected I decided to escape into nature at the end of the year albeit a curated version in an ecoresort within a rainforest where I was warned not to reach after 6 pm ldquodue to wild animals madamrdquo It is stunning I was quite content to gaze into infinity more precisely the infinity pool while drinking wine from a coffee cup But whenever I sit around aimlessly I am caught redhanded by a naturalist trying to make me escape further into natureOne kindly young woman explained all the hikes I could take My mask could not conceal my true nature because she ended with ldquomany people never make the early morning walk because they say the weather is so good I donrsquot feel like getting uprdquo We both laughed She sadly I sheepishly Then she added ldquoAlso madam whenever you are not in the room be sure to close the door tightly Otherwise the monkeys will come and take away the amenitiesrdquo ldquoAmenitiesrdquo I asked imagining monkeys blow drying their fur ldquoThey have a liking for the coffee creamer and sugar If itrsquos in a box they smash it and takerdquo she smiled ldquoAlso no room service because if there is food then insects will come If insects then frogs and then if frogs toh snakes are definitely going to come ha hardquo WotAt daybreak seduced by birdsong I sat on the balcony staring at stylish yellow bottle brush flowers Escaping into nature is not so bad after all I thought and wandered into the room balcony door open In a minute a hectic kerfuffle began in the trees Monkeys chasing amenities I ran and shut the door in the nick of time They escaped into natureLater yet another resident naturalist tried to interest me in hikes ldquoBut you cannot wear any bright clothes in the forestrdquo he said basically cancelling my entire wardrobe ldquoYou have bootsrdquo I shook my head inadequately He looked sad I wanted to stand up and say I had come first in college okay ldquoDoesnrsquot matter we will give you socksrdquo He pointed to a canvas sacking around the calves of a gent who immediately assumed a lofty explorer expression ldquoOtherwise tics and all Nowadays no leeches but in caserdquo Noting my noncommital air he gently added ldquoWe have a nature club too You can come and discuss with us in case you see any bird or butterfly you are curious aboutrdquoI only saw one butterfly nutty brown and black like a twotoned shoe And lavishtailed Malabar squirrels as big as little foxes Angelrsquos Trumpet flowers as oversized as a cartoon vamps pout crossed my path often Walking up the steep slope at night the moonlight penetrated the petals of poisonous white flowers The forest was densely silent and full of breath I realised I had not thought about work for 48 hours nor taken stock of the year or a photograph of that Malabar squirrel I had not even felt like sleeping in the city dwellerrsquos ultimate paltry luxury I think I will go for the 6 am hike tomorrow After all you canrsquot escape natureParomita Vohra is an awardwinning Mumbaibased filmmaker writer and curator working with fiction and nonfiction Reach her at paromitavohramiddaycom