I am half Gujarati. A Patel, actually. Well, my mother is a Patel. So, I am technically a half-Patel. (Or does that make me a full Patel from my mother’s side?) Either way, I am a Patedar. A land owner. So, naturally, I want OBC status. In fact, I demand it. See, don’t ask me uncomfortable questions, like why should the richest Gujju community seek reservation, okay!

My mother asked me to reach out to Hardik Patel, the new poster boy of the agitation, so I Whatsapped him on the group chat, PATEL RAP.