Rosalyn D'Mello: Wa(l)king up to a new day

That the body was not meant to be vegetative passive that it is instead vehicular invested in mobility in moving from point A to point B with the freedom to meander between these two destinations is something I only sensed before as fact Until last week I hadnt had the opportunity to confront the physics and philosophy of it When I came to from the laparoscopic myomectomy I didnt feel the lightness Id been expecting based on accounts by friends whod undergone the procedure I felt immobile and I shivered as I tried to shake off the leftover ether so I could be more wholly consciousBy the weekend I should have enough strength to be seated longer than 30 minutes the goal is to operate my recently purchased secondhand Brother typewriterFor the first few hours as my body struggled to acquaint itself with this strange discomfort I almost regretted consenting to the procedure even though I knew that the quality of my life in the last few weeks had become quite unenviable even thoushygh I knew that given the pace at whishych the fibroid was growing there seemed no other alternative than to have it removed It was 48 hours later when at 6 am I was finally encouraged to get out of bed and walk that I felt like I was beginning to healWhere does it start Rebecca Solnit begins the first chapter of Wanderlust her book on the history of walking with that line Muscles tense One leg a pillar holding the body upright between the earth and sky The other a pendulum swinging from behind Heel touches down The whole weight of the body rolls forward onto the ball of the foot The big toe pushes off and the delicately balanced weight of the body shifts again The legs reverse position It starts with a step and then another step and then another that adds up like taps on a drum to a rhythm the rhythm of walking My rhythm is more staggered with a slight delay between legs the left being compelled to be more loadbearing than my more fragile right At first I had to hold my swollen belly to insulate it from the impact of gravity but over days I acquired enough energy reserves to pace myself a bit Yesterday I walked down one set of stairs and up again twice just to feel the thrill of movement Otherwise I am still confined to walking within the confines of our apartment in Mumbai Usually I hold my Kindle in my hand and pace across each roomThe history of walking is an unwritten secret history whose fragments can be found in a thousand unemphatic passages in books as well as in songs streets and almost everyones adventures Solnit says The bodily history of walking is that of bipedal evolution and human anatomy Most of the time walking is merely practical the unconsidered locomotive means between two sites Its a strange book to read when one is under house arrest of sorts because every line every connection she makes about how walking lies at the intersection between every conceivable field of knowledge and can itself be construed as a field makes you want to walk incites you into action But what better time to read her than when one is recuperating regaining ones strength and healing Its like storing up on literary reserves so that when I am finally deemed able I can return to activity with more grace and gratitudeIt hasnt been easy to submit to this necessary convalescence to be temporarily dependent on my parents my sister just to reach for things at the bottom of the refrigerator or even for a blanket to spread over me when I sleep or for each meal It took me days to start returning friends phone calls because my throat felt sore from the tubes shoved down it and because I still felt listless But Im trying to embrace this period of rest and restoration trying to fill my time with superlative literature and television and music with intermittent writing assignmentsBy the weekend I should have enough strength to be seated longer than 30 minutes the goal is to operate my recently purchased secondhand Brother typewriter Its been difficult to explain my excitement at this supposedly dated device I try to communicate my enthusiasm but always fall short when someone especially from an older generation asks why I needed such a thing when I had a laptop I try to speak about the backspace key How on a laptop or a tablet or a phone the same key erases words as it tracks back and how though it performs a similar function on the typewriter it cannot erase an already typed letter or word Maybe I have some strange affinity for scars or have become less inclined towards cosmetic niceties It has something to do with creating a breadcrumb trail so that one is able to retrace the locomotive pattern of ones writerly consciousness as it imprints itself upon a page Because writing on a typewriter comes close enough to the gesture of walking It too is a form of wanderlustDeliberating on the life and times of Everywoman Rosalyn DMello is a reputable art critic and the author of A Handbook For My Lover She tweets RosaParx Send your feedback to mailbagmiddaycom