Spiderman was feeling very sorry for himself after the success of The Dark Knight Rises. He called Batman on his BatCell. “Why am I not as popular as you?

I tried to get a ticket to your movie, but all the shows were houseful. The box office guy didn’t recognise me, so to prove my identity, I attempted to climb the walls of INOX — but kept falling.

I really envy our archrival Clark Kent — he would’ve darted into a PCO booth, changed his clothes, and reappeared as Superman. Tell me, what do you have that I don’t? I even kissed a babe upside down in Spiderman 1. Can you do that?”

Illustration/ Amit Bbandre