What Sehwag feared more than Aussie bowlers, how Harbhajan fell in love

Not many would ever say anything derogatory about cricket legend Sachin Tendulkar but standup comic Vikram Sathaye has no such filter Two years ago Sathaye launched his book titled How Sachin Destroyed My Life where he chronicled his tryst with international cricket and cricketers through stories unknown to the average fan And now he has released a webseries titled What The Duck which is an extension of his obsession with the sport It recently released on the digital platform VIUVirender Sehwag had initially turned down an offer to feature on TIME because he didnrsquot know of the magazineThe show will see Sathaye engage cricketers in playful banter casual questions on life and career Sathaye has so far interviewed Virender Sehwag Zaheer Khan and Tendulkar ldquoI didnrsquot want the usual chatshow format where I go lsquoHello welcome to What the Duck and we have with ushelliprsquo The 14minute format starts with two guys chilling in a room engaged in a casual conversation I wanted it to be informal and almost a dressing room chatrdquo says Sathaye while chatting with us over the phone from Chennai where he will perform liveThe concept of the show he says was on his mind ever since he took to standup comedy 13 years ago ldquoI have toured a lot with the cricketers for various shows and over the years developed a bond with most including Tendulkar Rahul Dravid and Sehwag Most of the content has been culled out from conversations Irsquove had with them on flights or in the dressing roomrdquo says Sathaye who has performed in more than 1200 showsGautam Gambhir would listen to Hanuman Chalisa on his iPod before a match As a cricket fan he felt there was a fascinating side to cricketers outside the game that people crave to know about And for this you need to be privy to what happens in the dressing room ldquoMost cricketers come from smaller towns and are under immense pressure to perform In front of the media they canrsquot let their guard down So this is the place where they can be themselvesrdquo he says According to Sathaye music is often what helps the Indian team unwind He tells us of a masseuse called Mane kaka who had kept a special iPod for each cricketer While Tendulkar likes Lata Mangeshkar Dhoni loves Kishore Kumar and Gautam Gambhir listens to Hanuman Chalisa ldquoMane kaka would tell me lsquomore than giving massage and medical treatment to them Irsquove become their inhouse DJrsquordquoHarbhajan SinghSathaye reveals these littleknown anecdotes and candid revelations in the webseriesWhat The Duck wonrsquot be a televised version of the book he assures ldquoItrsquos an altogether different experience to hear it right from the horsersquos mouth instead of reading it in a bookrdquoHaving named his book after Tendulkar and with a title like that itrsquos evident that the author and cricketer share a close bond ldquoIn the past 25 years so much has been written about Sachin but people still hunger for more And therersquos always something to unravel about that manrdquo In the show Tendulkar talks about how superstitions played a role in his successFor instance his brother Ajit Tendulkar refused to let him eat duck before the 1999 World Cup The reason being that a day before the match three English players had a duck meal and were dismissed for a duck the next day ldquoHis wife Anjali would sit at the exact same spot while he was at the crease and would not even drink water for the entire duration of his inningsrdquo the comic says But for Sathaye if therersquos one quality that makes Tendulkar a genius itrsquos how he gets into the depth of an issue ldquoOnce we went to a restaurant to have sushi and he spent almost two hours discussing the method of preparation with the chef I ran out of patiencerdquo he laughs According to him itrsquos this aspect that makes Tendulkar and actor Aamir Khan close buddiesrdquoSathayersquos upcoming episode is with Harbhajan Singh ldquoBhajji fell in love with Geeta Basra after watching her in the song Woh Ajnabee from The Train When he called her for the first time Geeta didnrsquot know who Harbhajan was He later asked her out but got no lsquobhaavrsquo from her When he won the World Cup in 2011 she sent him a congratulatory message but refused to meetrdquo he says Bhajji used to chat up her driver to get closer and even promised him IPL ticketsFormer India captain Sehwag he says is the most fun cricketer to interview because of his sheer rawness While Sehwagrsquos on field shenanigans need no introduction mdash you must have heard of the whistling chatting and the sledging mdash not many know of his morbid fear of speaking English ldquoAt the start of his career Sehwag spoke the worst English everrdquo he says ldquoIn fact he would dread winning the Man of the Match award because that would mean having to go up to the podium and give an interview in English So whenever hersquod win the overall sentiment in the team would be lsquoOho Viru ki vaat lag gayirsquordquo he jokes Off the pitch too the problem would doggedly hound the Nawab of NajafgarhldquoDuring a diplomatic function in New Zealand when a hostess asked Viru if hersquod like to have coffee he replied lsquoyeprsquo Her next question was lsquoSir also what sauce would you prefer in your pasta To which he again said lsquoyeprsquo only to be nudged by Bhajji who came to his rescue because thatrsquos all he knew of angrezirdquo recalls the 42yearold cricket humouristSathaye says he has consciously picked cricketers from the older generation because they were unabashedly themselves ldquoSehwagrsquos Haryanviness was inyourface and Singh minus a filter made him who he isrdquo Todayrsquos generation he feels is a lot more robotic ldquoIf you see a Hardik Pandya from Gujarat he comes across as a cool dude from Mumbai The smalltown quirks that defined the earlier generation are missing in the boys todayrdquoBut if therersquos one cricketer Sathaye hasnrsquot been able to convince to come aboard the show itrsquos Mahendra Singh Dhoni ldquoHe is the most reclusive His words are measured so hersquoll never let himself go completely But Irsquom still trying my luckrdquo