You can only express your wish to try and stay friends and hope your partner feels the same way
Illustration/Uday Mohite
A few weeks ago, a co-worker found out that I have a crush on him. I don’t know what to do about this because he has been behaving a little strangely around me since then. He is not antagonistic, and always smiles or chats with me, but I get the feeling that he doesn’t know how to react to this information. I want to get to know him better and gauge how he feels about going out, but I don’t want to make it harder for him if he has no interest in me. Should I just assume that nothing is going to come of this and start pretending that everything is normal? That way, he may think this has all been a misunderstanding and things may go back to how they were.
You can choose to brush this whole thing aside and wonder about what might have been, or you can take control of this by asking him out for a cup of coffee and talk about clearing the air. As two adults, the best approach is honesty because it allows you both to put forth what you have to say and hope for the best. Tell him that you’re okay with him not being interested and that you don’t want things to be awkward in your professional lives. If he doesn’t agree to coffee, this also tells you everything you need to know, after which you can go back to the plan of pretending that everything is okay until time makes it easier for you both to move on from this episode.
How do I prepare myself for a breakup that I know is inevitable? It will cause us much pain, but I would like us to stay friends because we used to love each other at one point.
You can’t have it all because the end of a relationship will affect you in different ways. You can only express your wish to try and stay friends and hope your partner feels the same way.
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