I was in a relationship with someone for four years and always thought of him as my soulmate. We had a lot in common and had the same goals when it came to our lives and future. A few months ago, he decided this wasn’t working out and ended it. I have been completely lost since then because I have never been able to imagine a life without him. How do I carry on knowing that you can meet someone perfect for you and it can still fail? I don’t know if I have the strength to take the risk of being with someone ever again. He has moved on, but I don’t know if I will ever be able to.
The notion of what a ‘soulmate’ is may have more to do with fiction than reality because relationships are about two people putting in the work. Yes, you may have everything in common and may love each other a lot, but there are other factors that come into play too because you are individuals with minds, identities, and goals of your own. What you’re going through and feeling right now is understandable and makes sense given what you have lost, but it may be too soon to write off the possibility of all future relationships just yet. Give yourself time, don’t think about dating until you feel like it, and be kind to yourself until you wake up one morning feeling stronger. Time always leads to a change in perspective if one is patient enough.

My marriage isn’t making me happy because I am mostly housebound while my husband spends most of his spare time with friends. How do I get him to change this habit?
You will both have to change the way you do things together. Start by being more communicative about why this isn’t working and how it is causing harm. If he doesn’t do anything to address this concern, he needs to understand that the strain of this may eventually cause a breakdown.