Meenakshi Shedde: From #MeToo to #KidsToo

IllustrationRavi JadhavThe campaign against sexual harassment is gathering momentum worldwide This has followed the outing of serial casting coucher and Hollywood mogul Harvey Weinstein 65 after a number of women accused him of sexual assault or harassment over two decades Sexual harassment along with rape misogyny patriarchy and related social sicknesses has a long history in India Generally mens attitudes towards women hardened over a lifetime will require serious work or more likely legal punishment before they can become more respectful or sensitive towards women and children But what we can and must actively shape every day are our childrens attitudes towards sexual abuse they are easier to mouldSome time ago in Dubai I visited old friends from Bombay Bhaskar Raj his wife Mini and their son Manu about 11 They took me shopping at a mall and soon Manu told me he had seen a man take advantage of the crowd to deliberately brush against women He should be punished said Manu We observed the man from a distance and he did it again Manus parents wanted the man prevented from harassing women but were hesitant to get involved in a police case or to have me their guest be hassled So Manu and I told the store manager that a man was sexually harassing his customers But we would identify him only if he promised to take action in the store itself mdash eg publicly out or thrash him mdash but not call the police The manager had his security lead the man out with a warning that he could never enter the store again he was on CCTV and next time they would hand him over to the policeLater Manu and I discussed how courageous he was and how important it was that he reported when he saw a woman being harassed and followed it through till action was taken Somebody else would have simply ignored it and continued shopping We also discussed what could be appropriate punishment I did not know the UAEs laws on sexual harassment or if the police would arrest or even deport him He may have a wife and children dependent on his job So the punishment would need to be appropriately preventive rather than provoke further revenge against women I realised how critical it was to discuss issues around sexual harassment and abuse openly with even older preteenagers to give them perspective the tools to understand what it all means and clarify what action they can and cannot take as children What impressed me was how sensitive and mature young Manu was understanding that everything was not black and white Importantly he stood up against sexual harassment even when he was not personally affected If he would do his as a child he would likely do this as an adultMoreover Dipesh Jains superb awardwinning In the Shadows playing at the Mumbai Film Festival last week features Idu barely a teenager He runs away from home after being repeatedly abused by his violent father but instinctively returns to protect his mother as she has no one else The real battle is also within our families I hope we actively encourage the Manus and Idus of the world they are our biggest hopeMeenakshi Shedde is South Asia Consultant to the Berlin Film Festival awardwinning critic curator to festivals worldwide and journalist Reach her at meenakshisheddegmailcom