I am in a long-distance relationship and have never met my partner because of financial constraints. We met online and this has been going on for two years, but we are finally going to meet face-to-face in a few months. I am excited but also nervous because I don’t know how this will work. I don’t know if he will turn out to be completely different in real life and am worried that there may be a mismatch on his front too if I turn out to be less than what he expects. I want this relationship to work because we genuinely love each other, but the thought of meeting is frightening me. What should I do?
You’re going to meet someone you love, which should be a joyful experience. You can’t be in a relationship forever if you aren’t together in real life, so while your fears may be perfectly legitimate, they must be confronted at some point. What can work is focusing on why this relationship has worked for so long and what underpins it. If the love is real, along with the genuine desire to get to know each other in real life, this won’t be hard to manage at all. There may be some initial nervousness and teething problems as you get to know each other, but this will fade away quickly when you rediscover what brought you together in the first place. If there is a mismatch of expectations, that’s normal too because we create personas or versions of ourselves online. Who you both are in real life may exceed your individual expectations too, so don’t assume the worst before you have had a chance to talk. Take it slow, accept that this will take a little time to get used to, and keep the big picture in mind. If you both want this relationship to work, and love each other enough to do what it takes, everything else is just a matter of adjustment until you arrive at a place of comfort.

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