Why this Kolkata eatery will disappoint the foodie in you

There is something tragic about a misguided 19yearold who sets up an American showthemed cafeacute in the heart of Kolkatarsquos restaurantshopping district next to an iconic singlescreen theatre serving insipid vegetarian junk food out of the freezer The FRIENDS Cafeacute the first in the country is that Quixotic attempt at creating a hip meeting point for foodies and fans of the American sitcom with the notion that an orange couch hookahs and a postit wall is all you need to run a successful food joint funded by indulgent family members It makes no concessions for the fact that other than Phoebe why not rename it Phoebersquos Cafe everyone else on the iconic show was a hard core nonvegetarian and many of them foodiesThe fries were oily the stuffing in the sandwich staleSo there we were on a hot summer afternoon in the lane adjacent to Priya Cinema Deshapriya Park waiting to get in By the way this neighbourhood is home to some of the finest restaurants serving sea food traditional Bengali street food steak biryani and moreThe pineapple cheesecake had inedibility written all over itSo it turned out to be a comical prelude indeed At the gate a frail old man sat with a note book fancying himself to be a cross between a concierge and a bouncer He insisted there was no place inside but when we managed to get in it was way too hot and sunny to queue up outside we were told we could either wait at the bar stools inside or be served in the hookah area This was not before the gent outside had tried and failed to physically stop us from getting in had he been any younger we would have screamed harassmentSo it was full with teens and 20somethings having pizzas and mac and cheese and more interested in taking selfies against the familiar FRIENDS props mdash the couch the purple door Phoebersquos guitar postit walls and so on Service was being handled by family members and a couple of confused waiters It took them nearly 20 minutes to serve our honey lemon tea Rs 70 and virgin mojito Rs 150 It took another 20 for our sandwich and fries to arriveFood at FRIENDS cafeacute is not a priority The owners may have exhausted their imagination and resources for the deacutecor mdash which they have done quite well mdash to think of better ways to get the cosmoplitan crowd coming in The FRIENDS Fries Rs 180 and straight out of a packet were oily and their choice of cooking medium definitely needs a rethink The Moist Maker Sandwich Rs 200 was made with regulation white bread and stale stuffing the lettuce was wilted For a long time afterward we struggled with the oily aftertaste in our mouth The nail in the coffin mdash the cheesecake Rs 170We have never had a pineapple cheesecake mdash but it was the house special that day When it arrived it looked like a green blob It tasted worse mdash it was no cheesecake but just a lot of artificially flavoured whipped cream sitting on a base of a plasticy substance It had inedibility written all over itThe kids will keep coming here as long as there is a novelty in the FRIENDS setting But the restaurantrsquos only USP seems to be a selfie with an orange couchOne would imagine the generation that grew up on FRIENDS is in their 30s now During our stay we saw a number of older people walk out in a huff mdash the limited menu and pushing around into a smoky dimlylit hookah bar with teenagers munching unhealthy fries mdash is not many peoplersquos idea of eating out Yes and the loud screens playing the showrsquos popular episodes donrsquot have any takers Hardly anyone was interested in watching the showFor all those envying your Kolkata counterparts for walking away with the honours of hosting the first FRINDS cafeacute breathe easy The neighbourhood sandwich guy on a popup kiosk makes better stuffFRIENDS CafeFood GodawfulService ConfusedAmbience TrendyAddress 175A Motilal Nehru Road Desapriya aPark KolkataCall 91 9836645551