What he did was wrong, and there is no way around that, but acknowledging that you need time for yourself is the first step towards recovering from this
Illustration/Uday Mohite
A few weeks ago, my boyfriend of five years told me that he has no feelings for me, and that he was with me only because he didn’t want a serious relationship. It feels as if everything about our relationship was a lie and I have been so upset that I have been questioning my relationships with everyone else in my life. I don’t know if he said this just to hurt me, but the betrayal is huge and I think he did it deliberately to mess with my mind. I haven’t been able to sleep well and am considering speaking with a therapist because I don’t know to manage. How will I get over something so monumental? I always assumed we would get married because of how long we were together. What do I do now?
The end of any relationship is painful, more so when two people have spent a lot of time together. You have to accept this pain and acknowledge that your grief can only be dealt with in stages. Yes, what he did was horrible, but questioning everything else about your life is unfair until you have given yourself time to heal and to process what has occurred. Speak to a professional, by all means, but try being kinder to yourself because you are the victim. It may not seem like it now, but there will come a time when this won’t hurt as much as it currently is. What he did was wrong, and there is no way around that, but acknowledging that you need time for yourself is the first step towards recovering from this.
Should I just let my boyfriend go if I think he doesn’t like me as I like him? He doesn’t make an effort to hold on to me, and I feel as if my love is wasted on him.
A strong relationship is built on mutual love and respect. Without it, there is no future. If you already know that this is one-sided, end it now.
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