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Boyfriend’s friend makes me uneasy

Updated on: 24 February,2022 07:33 AM IST  |  Mumbai
Dr Love | mailbag@mid-day.com

If it isn’t serious, you are simply harming her, your parents and, ultimately, yourself. Think about what your expectations are before making a decision

Boyfriend’s friend makes me uneasy

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I have a problem with one of my boyfriend’s closest friends. I think he has a crush on me, and this creates all kinds of awkward moments whenever we are out together at a party or something. He stares at me a lot and is always trying to chat with me, which bothers me because he knows I am in a committed relationship with his friend. I have spoken to my boyfriend about this, but he thinks I am exaggerating and says his friend isn’t interested in me at all. I can’t shake that feeling though, because he’s not the one dealing with this stuff. I have now started to avoid him because I am afraid of how he will react when my boyfriend isn’t around. What should I do?
You should confront him because anyone who makes you uncomfortable in any way needs to be called out on their behaviour. Tell him why you think he bothers you and ask for an explanation. If he says he isn’t interested, point out why you think his actions make you think otherwise. Speak to your boyfriend again and tell him that disagreeing with you doesn’t invalidate your feelings. If you aren’t comfortable meeting his friend, he should be able to accept that as your decision and learn to respect it.

Should I end a relationship because of parental pressure? I love my girlfriend and my parents don’t like her, which is ok because I am not very serious about her. She says I should stand up for her because it’s the right thing to do.
If you aren’t serious about her, why are you in this relationship? If it’s casual, is she aware of this or have you decided to keep that information to yourself? What you do depends upon how much you respect your girlfriend, and what this relationship means to you. If it isn’t serious, you are simply harming her, your parents and, ultimately, yourself. Think about what your expectations are before making a decision.


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