I’m considering an affair with a colleague

I have been considering an affair with a work colleague for a while now. He and I have been at this office for five years and we have been flirting for a long time. I know he is single because he was engaged for a while and that ended. I have been married to a guy who only did it because our parents know each other. My husband doesn’t even speak to me if it’s not related to the household or some financial matter. We have no children and I have no intention of starting a family with him because I don’t want to raise a child alone without his emotional support. My family will be devastated if they find out about my affair, but I feel lost and empty all the time. My colleague is the only one who brings me happiness. What should I do?
What you are terming an affair is also adultery, and there are always repercussions. You may believe this will bring you joy, but it will be temporary because all it does is address a symptom, not the problem. Your marriage isn’t working and is the first thing you and your husband should acknowledge before you make any rash decisions. One tends to look for happiness or comfort anywhere because we are wired to look for it. If your husband isn’t interested in you or making this marriage work, you should first try and think about what your future with him is going to be like. For how long will you both be able to keep up this charade? I suggest you try and speak to this work colleague as a friend and speak to a professional counsellor about your marriage first. Talk to family and close friends, try and evaluate the implications of your marriage not working out, and focus on becoming financially secure before you make any decisions. If your husband isn’t going to do anything to make this succeed, there is no hope, and your future will seem bleaker.

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