Talk about why things didn’t work for either of you and what you both expect from each other this time
Illustration/Uday Mohite
My wife and I have been married for two years, and, in all that time, she refuses to accept my apologies no matter what I do. It’s as if she has been conditioned to always walk away from an argument with the belief that she was right. This was an endearing habit when we were dating, but it is starting to worry me because we are planning to start a family soon. If we have children, and they see that their father is never allowed to be right, it will change how they look at me too. Maybe I am being unnecessarily pessimistic, but it is just an unequal situation, and I don’t know how to change it. What can I do?
You can express these fears and point out why this makes you feel as if she doesn’t respect you as much as you think she should. Successful relationships are built on mutual respect, and this one-sided situation will only end in resentment. If she can’t comprehend that, consider speaking to a professional as a couple, because a neutral outsider’s perspective often helps get a message across. It is also important to call this out whenever it occurs because reinforcement can make it easier for you to get your side of the story across, even if it takes time. This won’t go away on its own though, or without active participation from both of you towards resolving it.
I am trying to build a relationship with a guy for a second time after we called it off a few months ago. How do I know if I am doing the right thing this time?
Communicating constantly will help you both understand each other better. Talk about why things didn’t work for either of you and what you both expect from each other this time. Relationships evolve and so do needs, but they also need to be expressed regularly until they start to become second nature for both partners. This builds trust and will strengthen your emotional bonds.
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