29 January,2009 06:39 AM IST | | The Hitlist Team
Is Hansal Mehta being a) bitchy, b) bitchy, c) bitchy, or d) funny?
He hauls up everyone from Amitabh Bachchan, to Aamir Khan and from Akshay Kumar to Anurag Kashyap. And yes, his friend and mentor Sanjay Gupta.
The director doesn't spare himself either! He writes, "Can the words of the man who celebrated mediocrity with his 'classic' Woodstock Villa and who made a mockery of teenage hormonal imbalance in the all-time-even-more-classic Yeh Kya Ho Raha Hai be taken seriously?" You decide. Presenting excerpts.
On Amitabh Bachchan: Mr Amitabh Bachchan gives us his exalted opinion about Slumdog Millionaire. He did not like this depiction of Mumbai's underbelly by a white man. Come on dear sir, there is no real underbelly in this film. SM is an enjoyable, polished and embellished work of supreme mediocrity.
Mr Bachchan created an industry out of mediocrity. Mediocrity from which our films are yet to recover. His films led us to a state of bankruptcy that is reflected in the ridiculously mediocre Chandni Chowk to China.
Why are you complaining, dear sir? Isn't Shantaram the same kind of poverty porn that you were happily about to embrace? Come on, Mr Bachchan.
On Aamir Khan:u00a0 Headlines screaming that Taare Zameen Par was out of the Oscar race. Hello! Did we expect this one-dimensional, overtly simplistic and dangerously hopeful look at dyslexia to be there? TZP was entertaining, successful and redeemed to a great extent by its actors.
Does that mean Aamir is a Majidi? Come on. This is the same Aamir Khan who did the masterpiece, Raja Hindustani. This is the same Aamir who grated on our nerves with the immensely successful Dil. The same Aamir who did Ishq, Mann and Mela. The same Aamir who did Fanaa. Andu00a0 subjected us to 'Ghajini'.
The prized Oscars. The one award function that his highness decides to attend. A celebration of the white man's superior mediocrity and a mockery of the developing world's poor mediocrity. To hell with the Oscars. They are as fake as any other award.u00a0
On Sanjay Gupta: I read about my dearest friend, Sanjay Gupta's sequel to Kaante. Sanjay will hate me for this. But I think he took Kaante too seriously.
It made money. Okay. But it was no Sholay. Quentin Tarantino praised Kaante (on PFC?) Come on Sanjay. You are far more gifted than the rip-offs that you make.
Take some time off the DVDs, bro. Write a script. Make a film. And don't let Tarantino's praise inspire you to make more inspired films.u00a0u00a0
On Akshay Kumar: The self-proclaimed king. The king of mediocrity is 'magnanimous' enough to 'sacrifice' an award to Aamir Khan.
An award category that is laughable Most Popular Actor. Mr Akshay Kumar gifts his popularity to Aamir Khan. Wow! Aamir Khan must feel on top of the world.
The one-man industry called Akshay Kumar who carries a disaster called 'Chandni Chowk to China' on his ageing shoulders pays his generous tribute to a mediocrity called 'Ghajini'.
Gawd! This guy takes himself and his stardom too seriously.u00a0u00a0
On Anurag Kashyap: We make him, the writer of some forgettable flicks by Suneel Darshan, Sanjay Gupta, Ram Gopal Verma, Harry Baweja and a certain Hansal Mehta into a man with superhuman powers.
We make him into a messiah, a -bearer, a God. Any negative comments on him are slammed. Bad reviews for his films are taken as a personal affront. Give the guy a break.
If he begins believing that only PFC means excellence, understands his cinema and only means the cinematic universe it will be a great disservice to him. You my fellow PFCians, don't take Anurag so seriously. Don't take criticism on Anurag so seriously. Chill.u00a0
