We can't separate because of EMIs...

Illustration/ Uday Mohite

My wife and I have been discussing a separation for almost two years but haven't taken any concrete steps towards doing this. We have been married for over a decade, but it has been unhappy for all this time. We are both desperate to end it but can't because there are financial reasons. We own a house together and share the EMI, so a divorce will make it hard for either of us to be secure. We are miserable, but stuck. How can we resolve this?

You have to evaluate a couple of things here, starting with your priorities in life. We all deserve happiness, so your wife and you should both consider the toll this decision is taking. Financial security is a tangible thing that can be achieved over time, if you make smart decisions. If EMIs are getting in the way of you both living your lives, why don't you speak to investment experts who can try and find a solution? Have someone look at your savings, consider what you both earn, draw up projections for what you will continue to earn based on your age and experience, and then think of alternatives that allow you to create a new path. There are always solutions, provided you are ready to work towards them. If you can't foresee living in a state of misery for the rest of your life, you will both simply have to do what it takes to get out.

I am struggling to live with my girlfriend because she has problems with body odour. She is also extremely messy, which is something I can't accept. Should I end this relationship because of these reasons even if they seem trivial?

Anything that seems trivial or not depends entirely upon the person who is affected by it. Only you can make a decision if these issues are more important than how you feel about her.

The inbox is now open to take your most carnal and amorous queries. Send your questions on email to lovedoc@mid-day.com