How do I make my husband and my baby bond?

Dear Diana,
I just had a baby a month ago. Now, my husband works a lot and when he is home, I want him to care for the baby and bond with him so I can have a break and someone else holds the baby while I get work done.
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Now the baby really doesn't stay too long with my husband. I am guessing this is probably because he is very attached to me because of the breastfeeding.

The baby cries when I'm not around him. My husband infers he is hungry and gives him to me. What I'm asking is how do I get my husband to hold the baby just for an hour? How do I get my baby to like him?

Name withheld
Dear Friend,
You can pump your milk and put it into bottles so he can take a turn with the feeding too, that is a good way for him and baby to feel that bond.

Just hand the baby to him. It should not be a big deal; it is his baby too. You're tired too; probably just as tired as him. He will never feel the bond if he keeps giving him to you. He needs to learn to soothe the baby. It can't be hungry all the time, babies like to be rocked and lulled.

A first baby is daunting but remember, it needs all the love and attention you can give it, he will get used to it and you might find after a while you cant get it off him! Allow the child to lie around though, perhaps around the husband so he's naturally curious and worried about holding him.

I'm trying but he keeps pushing me away

Dear Diana,
The guy that I am seeing on and off as friends has again being going through a rough time. I have tried to be supportive but he just keeps pushing me away. What should I do to show him I care?

Name withheld
Dear Friend,
Perhaps he doesn't mean to, but he's hurting you quite deeply, isn't he? Is this really the way you want to live? And there are no guarantees that he won't hurt you again. I think for your own peace of mind, it is time to walk away.

But I want to have sex!

Dear Diana,
Soon after getting married, my husband had an unfortunate accident where he became paralysed, resulting in us notbeing able to have a sex life.

I love my husband dearly and I did not leave him. I look after him and attend to him the bestway I can. However, lately I have been becoming very upset by my lack of sex. I am 28 now. The last time I actually had sex was seven years ago.

My 20s has been virtually sex-free and I find myself craving it so much! I am not a bad person, nor do I want to leave my husband. I just want to have sex. Should I have an affair?

Karishma
Dear Karishma,
You sound like a very loving wife. It's easy for us to recommend you not have an affair. The fact is unless your husband makes a miraculous recovery, you'll be without physical intimacy for the rest of your life.
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You don't need anyone here to tell you how much work and sacrifice goes into taking care of someone who cannot take care of themselves.

This has broad and lasting implications. But it's a decision you will have to take regardless, because he won't be able to satisfy you in the way you'd like to.
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Whatever you decide, absolutely no one has the right to judge you for it. Not many people walk in your shoes.