Now and then of the Indian cricket team

Coach Gary Kirsten is reported to be planning to file a caustic report on the players' fitness. is this how we wants them to look ufffd like in their debut years?

Coach Gary Kirsten is reported to be planning to file a caustic report on the players' fitness. is this how we wants them to look ufffd like in their debut years?

Pssst. Gary Kirsten, Team India'su00a0 coach for the T-20 in the Caribbean is ready to spill the beans ufffd calories we mean. According to early reports, Kirsten is to reveal to the Board of Control for Cricket in India (BCCI) that seven players were unfit to play in the competition ufffd too much partying, too many late nights, too much cricket maybe and some of them may have been carrying too many kilos too.u00a0 A combination of injury and weight, does not make for a great combo on the cricket pitch. Here is a guess list of the unfit seven Kirsten could be pointing at...

Gautam Gambhir: His fielding and running between the wickets was a 'Gambhir' samasya. GG needs to do some Gautam-Buddha like introspection on his current state. Not in the dugout, but underneath a Bodhi tree maybe.

Harbhajan Singh: The Turbanator may not set the weight scales zooming but maybe, there was still some strain after carrying Nita (bhabhi) Ambani in the air, after the IPL semi-final victory.

Yusuf Pathan: He could not bring his great IPL form to the West Indies, the rescue man for India, who was to play those all important catalyst cameos, to up the run rate, fell way short. Well, Mr. Pathan, remove those stylish Oakley glasses, and take a hard look at reality.

Yuvraj Singh: Ah now, what can one say for the Punjab da puttar who looks like he has quaffed down too much lassi with malai in the past few months? You were the man supposed to land the killer paunch ufffdoops punch to the opposition but it did not turn out quite that way after all. Drop the parathas soaked in ghee, cut all that partying and sneaking out late at night, you certainly do not cut a 'preity' picture on the field. Mr Kirsten would sure not be singh-ing your praises, Yuvi.

	u00a0
Yuvraj during the 2000 ICC Knock-Out Trophy	Yuvraj at the 2010 IPL

Zaheer Khan: The Indian spearhead was supposed to strike fear in the hearts of the opposition ufffd look at Z and you're dead kind of thing but this T20 he just Khan't have got it on. So what is Z to do now? Go back to the 'ABC' of pace bowling, so that he does not get carted all over the place.

Rohit Sharma: Rohit ufffd go hit. Unfortunately did not connect with bat as well as you could apart from the Australia game. Maybe on the firing line for some extra kilos. Or maybe not. Nobody yet knows what the Board of Control for Cricket in India (BCCI) would read about you, but this weight might certainly not be the one that is worth it.

Piyush Chawla: Mr Roly Poly may have said to himself: arre T-20 ko maar goli. Unfortunately, the bullets on you, Mr Baby Face. With Gary Kirsten firing on all cylinders, we hate to think what the coach may have penned down about you ufffd whatever it is, go easy on the chow, Mr. Chawla.