All that swiping for ‘Nothing’ Hill: Why more Gen-Z are getting tired of dating apps

Tara Menon has had creepy and confusing situations with people on dating apps and doesn’t believe in them anymore. PIC/M FAHIM

Dating apps don't work out as we want them to, for our age at least," says 25-year-old graphic designer Tara Menon. Today, dating apps have become less about finding genuine connection and more about coping with loneliness. "Rather than really wanting a relationship, we kind of just feel lonely and are not able to shake off that feeling," she says, "All that we need is like a quick fix."

Like many Gen Z users across urban India, Menon found herself trapped in the repetitive cycle of matching, chatting, ghosting, and starting over again. Her experience reflects a growing contradiction within India's booming online dating culture. Dating apps continue to grow rapidly among young urban users, promising endless choice and compatibility. Yet for many Gen Z users, the experience increasingly feels hollow and emotionally draining.

A 2025 Forbes Health survey found that 79 per cent of Gen Z users reported experiencing dating app burnout, citing ghosting, repetitive conversations, emotional fatigue, and lack of meaningful connection as major reasons. The survey also found many users spending close to an hour daily on these platforms, often seeking distraction or validation more than commitment.

Menon says she did meet several people she genuinely connected with, though mostly in a platonic sense. She recalls speaking to one man from another city who appeared genuinely interested in her. "He was really sweet and we had a lot of fun talking to each other as well," she says. But eventually, she realised he was pursuing another girl in exactly the same manner.

"That's the thing," she says, describing how difficult it becomes to trust intentions on dating apps where everyone seems to be speaking to multiple people simultaneously. The ambiguity around what people want from these apps is another recurring frustration. Menon describes many interactions as feeling "transactional", especially when expectations are left unspoken.

"This one dude, he seemed like the perfect guy. He checked off everything on a woman's list for a man," she says. But the evening quickly took a turn after drinks. "He started saying things like men provide for women," she recalls. "If men sleep around with other women, it's okay because that's what men do. But if a woman sleeps around… that makes her characterless."

What disturbed her further was what followed the next day. "Basically, the whole transactional thing; ‘I would now like to have sex because I paid for the bill and dropped you home.'"

Even as dating apps become deeply embedded in Gen Z social life, Menon has begun to question whether they are truly the best way to find love. And she's not the only one. "I think dating apps are less about genuinely bringing people together and more about capitalising on this feeling of loneliness," she says.

‘The apps are designed to fail'

Dating expert and content creator Chitra Balachandran explains how the apps are set up to keep you there, stuck in a loop

Dating expert and content creator Chitra Balachandran believes dating app fatigue among Gen Z is closely tied to growing digital exhaustion. "Their entire life has been on apps," she says, "Digital is overwhelming at this point for them because their entire life is guided by one app or the other."

Unlike organic interactions through shared circles or activities, apps rely heavily on filters and curated identities. "We're told that if you give us a few keywords, if you set a few filters, there's a chance you'll meet your perfect partner. It seldom works out that way because that's not how human connection is designed," she says.

She also points to the "illusion of abundance" created by dating apps. "In the back of your mind, you're thinking, ‘If I swipe for five more minutes, maybe I'll find someone better.'"

Balachandran argues that dating apps are ultimately designed to keep users engaged rather than help them leave the platform. "They all say they want you to find someone and delete the app, but that doesn't serve their business. The gamification of swiping left and right is what reduces intention," she says, "Apps are designed to fail."

‘People don't get to see who you are'

Vyom Gosar, 22, talks about why he quit dating apps altogether

There's a quote in one of the dating apps: You're not judged on the best photo but on the worst one. That gave me the ick," says 22-year-old pharmaceutical student Vyom Gosar. "If I'm being judged and rejected without even getting a chance to show my personality, then I don't need it."

Though he initially joined apps that promised "true connection", Gosar says the reality rarely matched the branding. "The promise that the apps give us are not usually carried forward into the people who are using those apps," he explains, "People don't really get to see who you are." Eventually, he stopped using apps and began meeting people through college and workspaces instead.

He also points to the subtle social judgement surrounding dating apps. "Your friends will share screenshots of your profile and ask what you are doing there," he says. At the same time, constant exposure to "red pill" dating advice (central belief is that society favours women and oppresses men) and algorithm-driven content online further influenced how he viewed dating app culture and relationships. "I don't believe in it but it did play a bit of a role."

‘I don't want to date anyone'

Eshita Samson Sathe, 21, says Gen Z's reliance on dating apps has hamstrung the ability to interact offline

I might as well go celibate at this point," laughs 21-year-old Eshita Samson Sathe. "I don't want to date. I don't want to sleep with anyone. I have my cats and I think that should be it for now."

Unlike many users who join dating apps looking for romance, Sathe says she initially downloaded them simply because a friend encouraged her to. "I was just looking for friends," she says, adding that she did end up forming a few close platonic connections through the apps. But despite making her intentions clear, she found that many conversations eventually became sexual.

"I'm thinking, okay, this is a friend," she recalls, "But what responses I got from them was weird. And I got cast with an evil eye for saying I am just exploring the app."

Sathe also believes dating apps have fundamentally changed how young people communicate. "Because of these apps, people have lost the ability to approach other people," she says. After brief experiences on Tinder and Bumble, which she describes as "strictly made for hookups", she deleted both within a day. "I cannot do this," she says.

‘It's like shooting a shot from the moon'

A 22-year-old explains how you can't discover someone's personality and demanour solely through texting or a few dates

Karan Singh [name changed], a 22-year-old law student, finds dating apps repetitive and draining. Having returned to dating apps four months ago after using them previously, he says the initial excitement quickly faded. "I was getting matches," he recalls, "but then I realised that the vibe wasn't there." Most conversations, according to him, lasted only a few weeks before gradually dying out.

Singh always knew that dating apps create an "illusion of choice". While users constantly swipe and send likes, he says there is no guarantee of real connection. "It's like shooting a shot from the moon," he says.

"You can't figure out their demeanour or how they carry themselves," he explains, adding that confidence, personality, and social behaviour matter far more to him in real-life interactions. Meeting someone organically at a party or social gathering, he says, feels far more genuine and intuitive. "But I can't go to parties all the time."

Even when conversations do begin on an app, the process often starts feeling monotonous. "If the conversation doesn't catch my attention after like six or seven texts, I slowly just lose it," he says, "Good to end it before it exhausts me more."

What Tinder says

In its 2026 product keynote, Tinder acknowledged that "with more than half our users under 30", younger daters want experiences that feel "more authentic, lower-pressure, and worth their time." Tinder announced several new features aimed at reducing burnout.

These include "Chemistry", an AI-powered recommendation system meant to "cut through dating fatigue" by offering curated matches, as well as offline event pilots. According to Tinder's survey of 18-25-year-olds, 64 per cent said emotional honesty is what dating needs most, while 60 per cent wanted clearer communication around intentions.

79%
Proportion of Gen Z users who report dating app burnout
'Source: Forbes Health survey, 2025