I like both guys I am chatting with!

Updated: Jul 15, 2020, 04:54 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

I don't know how other people do this so easily, but I think I need to focus on just one of them at a time and stop being deceptive

Illustration/ Uday Mohite
Illustration/ Uday Mohite

picI have been chatting with two guys using online dating apps, and they both seem to like me very much. I like them both too, because they are nice and genuinely interesting people, but it sometimes makes me feel guilty because neither of them knows about the existence of the other. They both think I am chatting with them alone, which makes me feel as if I am deliberately leading them on in some way. I don't know how other people do this so easily, but I think I need to focus on just one of them at a time and stop being deceptive. Are rules for online dating the same as they are for dating in real life?

I am a little confused by your question because I can't really tell if there is a real problem you want to address. If you aren't actually dating either of these guys, why exactly do you have a problem chatting with them both? In real life, if you weren't in a relationship, wouldn't you try and date multiple people before figuring out who you wanted to be with?

A guy I have been dating for a few months doesn't seem to want things to evolve in any way. Whenever I talk about wanting a relationship, he brushes me off by saying he is happy to be single. He keeps giving me hints that he isn't looking for anything serious, even though I think I have been clear about what I am looking for. I am not into something casual, and I think that's what he wants. How do I be more clear to him?

How aren't you both not clear already? He is telling you what he is looking for, and it isn't what you want. There is nothing more to be said because, if things were to change, one of you would have agreed to the other's proposition by now. If you know what you want, why waste time on someone who isn't looking for the same thing?

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