Respect should always be mutual and, if you feel as if it isn’t, she should be called out for it
Illustration/Uday Mohite
A few weeks ago, someone I was in a relationship with for six months told me that he didn’t want to be with me anymore. It came as a shock because I didn’t see anything wrong between us and didn’t even know there were any problems until that conversation. It was a difficult time for me, but I ended things because I didn’t want to force him. It took me a long time to get over that because I was not given any valid reasons. For the past few weeks, he has been messaging me daily, and calls whenever he’s free. We have long chats, and I am starting to feel as if he regrets his decision. He hasn’t said anything yet, but he asked me out this week and I accepted. I don’t know what to do if he apologises and asks for another chance. Should I give this another go and risk being hurt again?
You can always meet him to see what he has to say, but the risk of being hurt will always persist until he can give you an explanation for what happened and why he behaved the way he did. It is then up to you to evaluate that explanation and see if it heals some of the pain you have experienced. There’s nothing wrong with second chances if you both still feel strongly about each other, but you should consider a more measured approach this time because you have history to back you up. Ask more questions about why things ended, what has changed, and why he thinks you should give him another chance. You can also insist on staying friends until you have had time to gauge whether this situation has evolved in any way.
When I refuse to do something, my girlfriend says I am being disrespectful and forces me to do it. Isn’t she the one being disrespectful?
Respect should always be mutual and, if you feel as if it isn’t, she should be called out for it.
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