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I hate this state of uncertainty...

Updated on: 10 July,2024 06:45 AM IST  |  Mumbai
Dr Love | mailbag@mid-day.com

How do you feel about your trainer? Do you like the idea of him flirting with you? If you’re interested, the easiest way to gauge his intentions is to ask him out

I hate this state of uncertainty...

Illustration/Uday Mohite

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I have been dating a guy who is legally separated but not divorced. We have been together for a little over a year now, and he keeps telling me that the divorce will happen, but there are legal issues that are delaying it. I have tried to sympathise with him because I know he isn’t lying, but there are also moments of doubt where I ask myself if I am just wasting my time with this person. I don’t know where this relationship is going, or what he intends once the divorce eventually comes through. When I ask about this, he says he doesn’t know either, because he wants to take it one step at a time. I am thinking of ending this relationship and asking him to contact me only once his divorce comes through and he is serious about what he wants. Is this a good idea or am I being too hasty and chasing away someone I really love, and who really loves me?
You’re doing what you believe is in your best interests, based on how you feel. There is nothing wrong with making this decision because a lack of stability can damage any relationship, let alone one that is already precarious because of his legal predicament. Loving a person is important, but so is reciprocity. If he feels the same way about you, he shouldn’t have a problem getting back once he knows what he wants. If he doesn’t, you haven’t lost someone important, just someone who didn’t value you the same way. Do what you think is right for your future.


How do I know if someone is flirting with me? I go to a gym where the trainer is very nice to me, and I can’t gauge his intentions. I don’t want to embarrass myself. What should I do?
How do you feel about your trainer? Do you like the idea of him flirting with you? If you’re interested, the easiest way to gauge his intentions is to ask him out. 


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