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I need quality time with him...

Updated on: 17 May,2024 04:02 AM IST  |  Mumbai
Dr Love | mailbag@mid-day.com

If he isn’t part of your life, how does this affect you? It’s only a matter of time before his friends get the message

I need quality time with him...

Illustration/Uday Mohite

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My boyfriend and I have been dating for around four months and things are great, except that it often feels like I’m not getting enough quality time with him. He is busy with work and personal commitments, and our relationship tends to take a back seat, possibly because it’s so new. I don’t want to push him and make him commit to more time, but it feels like this won’t evolve in any meaningful way if we don’t make an effort to get to know each other better. We chat a lot through the day on WhatsApp and often call each other, but I don’t think it’s the same as being together in the real world. Should I bring this up and ask him to try harder, or wait until he feels the same way and proposes some change in how often we meet? 
If this bothers you, there is no reason not to bring it up, because it’s the simplest way of getting him to know what you’re thinking. It’s also a critical component of the evolution you mention because it’s part of how you get to know each other and grow as a couple. It’s great to be able to meet often, and you’re right about it being better than communicating online, but there is no reason why you should not be able to arrive at a compromise that helps you both arrive at a better place in this relationship.

I can’t understand why my ex-boyfriend hasn’t told his friends that we are no longer together. I have told everyone in my life that our relationship has ended, but he hasn’t said a word, and I don’t know if this is because he thinks we can sort out our issues and get back together. It is definitely not happening, so I’m thinking of telling them all myself. Is this a good idea?
If he isn’t part of your life, how does this affect you? It’s only a matter of time before his friends get the message.


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