Does this mean our relationship has no future? It won’t get better until she understands what I am saying
Illustration/Uday Mohite
I am a 23-year-old guy and have been dating a woman who is four years older. We used to work together, and she was actually my manager for a while, but I moved to another company around a year ago. We have a great time together and have always liked each other which is why this relationship was not a surprise. The problem is, when we argue about anything, she turns into something else. It is as if she has forgotten that I am no longer reporting to her. It makes me feel as if she doesn’t love me as much as she wants to control me. We shouldn’t be in this position because I keep telling her that I am her equal despite the difference in age. She doesn’t get it. Does this mean our relationship has no future? It won’t get better until she understands what I am saying.
You’re right about it not getting better until she accepts where you’re coming from, and yes, strong relationships are built upon equality. It’s possible that she hasn’t been able to see this from your perspective, so try calling it out whenever it happens. If that doesn’t help, speak about this when you aren’t having an argument, because a calm discussion about what you both want from each other may lead to a more respectful space. If that doesn’t work either, you may have to be honest and tell her that this isn’t going to end well, because it won’t.
How do I get my ex-boyfriend to accept that I am never going back to him? We have split up and gone back to each other three times, so I think a part of him always expects a break-up to be temporary. This time, I want to end the cycle permanently.
If nothing you say works, actions might. If he can’t contact or communicate with you, he may finally get the message. It may seem harsh, but a serious break may be the only option for now.
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