'I want to break up with my girlfriend...'

Dear Diana,
I've been in a relationship with an office colleague for a year. I recently found out that my girlfriend had been messaging other guys in the office and since then I have second thoughts about her. I still love her as a friend and we have a great time together, but romantically I'm not interested in her anymore. I want to break up with her as I have lost trust in her. When I asked her about the text messages, she said it was due to being part of a WhatsApp group and it was fun. She said she got carried away as the guys were cracking some dirty jokes. It was all harmless fun according to her. She felt I am overreacting. We have a lot of common friends outside office as well and I feel a breakup will divide the group into two — those with her and those with me. This has further added to my misery and I don't know what to do.
— Tushar

Illustration/Amit Bandre
Illustration/Amit Bandre 

Dear Tushar,
From the looks of it, it does appear to be that your girl was indulging in some harmless fun. But you are unsure, so one way is to check with the other guys. Instead of being so paranoid, why don't you ask one of the guys who is part of the WhatsApp group what was the joke all about. I am sure he will then tell you what messages were being exchanged and your girl's role in it. One way out is to overlook it. Your girl has given you an explanation as she has nothing to hide. You could have been on a boys night out and indulged in some harmless fun too, what if she had reacted in a similar manner? Try putting yourself in the other person's shoes. She has been loyal to you and you can't deny that, if she had anything to hide she would not have openly done anything and admitted to it. You should just overlook this incident instead of taking the drastic step of a break up over some text messages.

Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012

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